Exploring the child's world IV; Life is a bunch of pain

Life is a bunch of pain at 12. Randy maintains that out of spite he has been framed on a model's chimed by a girl in school. Now he is not allowed on the school bus with decent children. He is angry and alone. No one will listen to his side however annoying he becomes. We are told that in France a man accused of a crime by the police has to establish his innocence in the United States it is presumed that an accused man is innocent until he is declared guilty by a jury of his peers. Some accused persons have reservations about entering a plea of not guilty when they know that they are guilty. A plea of not guilty simply means that the person has not yet been tried and convicted legally. The plea refers to legal not to actual guilt. In some jurisdictions it is mandatory that every suspect enter a plea of not guilty no matter what his status is. We find that many children and some adults try to do that which is not legally required. They try to prove that they are innocent. I am not sure that it is easy to establish innocence. I

am not sure that it is even possible. In America one need not establish that he did not perform some criminal act. It is up to the authorities to prove that he did. The only way to dislocate an accusation of guilt is by advancing an alibi where rather suspicious of people with alibis. We are even more suspicious of those who use alibis when they are not asked for an alibi should be reserved for use in situations in which it looks as though the guilt has been established. This line of thought ties in with the old saying that a liar would do well to have a good memory. We now present Father Duff a professor of sociology at Duquesne University. He will conduct the interview with a little boy who says that he does not mind it when people refuse to believe his lies but it makes him mad when people do not believe the truth. Father Duffy Randy is factually an orphan although he is not legally such. The mere fact that parents are not physically present does something to

a child and what it does is not very pleasant to observe in the present instance. It has created a child who was worried. Nasty demanding defensive hostile and aggressive. He cannot make friends although he needs friends to support him in the absence of parents. He alienates adults and seems to pull anger and punishment from them. They regard him with suspicion and they do not trust him. They are not happy with him. They are not even satisfied with his maximum effort. Although I doubt that anyone has ever witnessed this boy acting with maximum effort. He tends to whine and complain. This is the kind of young man who winds up as a Yardbird in the services we call him the guardhouse lawyers for they seem to know all their privileges and rights but they never seem to move over into the study of such things as duties responsibilities character dedication loyalty and service. A person cannot substitute self service for

service of others and then expect others to be willing to meet his needs. One who looks out for himself first last always and only eventually finds himself alone and abandoned. This is where this child is now. It's unlikely he will find his way back what will happen to him. I don't know nor do I know anyone who does. I'm always I'm always wonder what I'm going to do to get you know get someone to someone's attention. You know just really when you get me to do just go after I'm sure you don't have to look in here. You know I don't get it. Well what you saw how did I get

back to you know to take you know preacher to talk to you Never happened before. A father's Just because a preacher and he is a Catholic preacher can't nobody move in you see oh my grandmother came up before she was kicked out. He was Muslim. I don't understand things like that. Mark Martin I want to have a chance for my grandmother. I think I have a chance to say you know sure she's real I want you you know the truth you know. But she is considered a liar she treats me like she's a grandmother

and I think that I have just as much to do with the use of the court. How come you are what separated you will need sensible shoes for your school. You are well known for. My brother will blame your home and I was blame the school and I didn't go look at I said to anyone in the hood and and this said it everyone says she lies. She says you can't live with you she says she has a hole or the bottom of the she was you know it does. You can't believe the lies when the words you do that just to hurt you. She came and she let me love where the girls were there and found stuff in the schools

you know using her and she started as she says it would be separate and her be troubled again because she wanted to. There was and it wasn't well because my brother could prove that he didn't do it. Yeah but how can you prove a thing like that. You were done you know. More clues from Took my brother down the block unlucky. He tried every way whatsoever that tried to say he did but he couldn't. We you know when you suppose are taken to a place you always blame for your school because children are not told. How can you prove you didn't do something that's wrong. Whenever I do and I try to live my way out of it I can will not let me ride on to something I try to tell the truth I can't. Do you think it's possible

this girl was trying to be a friend of yours and you turn her down and she accused you of this you know what I think is she's been trouble was a place that because she's shy and succeeded in getting us until we called in by the principal of the school. Why did you find out what the girl said. I was tough until he said what we had gone up and the school bus was a well known your suggestion for your sex club stuff and I said no I'm not the type of boy and she said why Sr. and I said well what do you see that you do. So she got to talk while a

policeman told him that by the way Rush just quote the call to please talk don't come over don't come over I was going downstairs. And those are the detectives start talking to me and that was it. I just what I was a lot on the bus and I had I think maybe three miles to walk around the world how to use a bus or to this you know when they brought you here and they picked me up and asked me some question I LET ME GO ON TOPIC. So I went home and told my grandmother you didn't tell them. Well we're knocking she joked. She did. I don't know what happened to her but she bowed her head No she just jumped up a single.

Oh ma'am. Something you know maybe she'd knocked out right away to the bathroom. Oh good. You know the little cutie like to see you break the glass in just a minute. Put him under the foot a little news. And one of them go for a police exact door not to please pick me up. And I told I'm not going to play so good for now up to myself soon get me going to court next day. I was stuck up there and you let me have a chance to prove myself. Listen what you can do improving if you fell out of bed now hit your head. You started crying nurse came in and he said well he did it. How quickly why didn't do it. No we're prohibited to show you what would be thought of it when you said

I didn't like it. Whenever a person falls on the blankets. For how long I thought my back until you're used to trying to prove things but when I was someone push out baby take out the blanket with you. Well suppose you were you were here in the bathroom and you shall eat your head and you said I did. How do you know you can be my regular shoes. No but if they could this girl did it to you she gives you something you couldn't do it. Well how could you please if you know I couldn't fool anything you said you can either think you could you know what I mean to get would be for the three girls were but they didn't. What I'm always saying goes life is nothing but a bunch of bunch of pain for you for everybody. Some people get some relief from payments no one gets a relief from the payments no you know.

I know you feel I'm on the ground or just was pretending. And there's someone in my company when I'm back too much. We came in. I wish that I would have someone to keep me company. Right now and I have to keep going. Because of this bridge and he was trying to do things today. Spill and spin. Are you still with us is this is pretty interesting game. Did you get too much out of the cars. I'm not a mug ABH you know just the morning and just the flu. Are you going to be a big boy. You get bored with things you keep you occupied when you were to

visit to Mexico. To be. Fair one minute next to me like whenever I'm going to be first came here. Me and him were good friends and how I tried to separate us. He could lose two good friends. Then he went to camp. He came back here last June. Cause I had a friend once and then I lost mostly it's just going to lose him. I will be so tough on the laddies who work there and all the workers I can get hurt. They do records like the three little kittens things I have to do too much for babies. You skipped alone still have to trust someone who gets my goods at you know for don't because my babyhood but will take to make you happier.

Something to do something to do something about Christmas. OH MY someone and. The downstairs is none too recent. Yeah he found out if you give him a hard time not too much he has to come every once in awhile. Call your coppers. When you misbehave is that what you do to get him to decide to do something. Did you do something bad you know I'm just I'm always I'm always wondering what I'm going to do to get it you know get someone to someone's attention. I think you will agree that it would be pretty difficult to try to adjudicate 20 to 35 cases like this in a day. What does one do with a boy like Randy. Would you return to his community where he never adjusted to do so involves problems for him and problems for the community

to place him with foster parents presents problems and hazards of a different nature to place him in a training school may embitter the boy and expose him to new dangers of becoming worse. This is why the judge must rely on a good case write up and sound recommendations. Here is a second child. He is one of a family of nine children and is the first of the children to get into trouble. This speaks rather well for the family situation. The boy is not too seriously nor too deeply involved in mischief. A good intake supervisor would probably recognize this as the type of boy who can be straightened out rather easily and rather quickly. The boy is not too bright. But then he's not too bad either. He would probably receive minimum treatment in the form of probation with several counseling sessions in which he can receive some guidance information and talking out. We first asked him his age.

His answer was 14 and how long you've been here. Nine days you Catholic or. Yes and what grade you in school. Do you ever get left out you know. And and how do you do in school to that much what your weak spots. Sonali Oh no you know you can't read too well you know and if you can't read well you can't do any other things well you know. I can really build it. How many in your family. So yeah. Say there's about nine. Which ones. Which ones are most like you think you know one of them right. Which ones are opposite of Saddam myself you know they're all different kids. How well how old are they say.

My oldest ones when Reuben's married he's still in the army in two brothers. 1718 duty in the Army right now to my good older sister she's getting ready to get married and my other sisters are still at home. With my grandmother and how you go along with everyone's home you know to have you know it's clear that they were troubled you get in this time rather than cause I'm still too with two other kids they store three of them so that it was five together or you know just. All together there was only three courses three Carstone. I was in with two full. Did you do any driving. You know came to I think were the older boys you know to just same age

one's 14 and the other was 15 and they do the driving here. Remember anything I said Sunday about the plane being a plane. Yes what I say said I that she damn plane with someone else. He might wreck up irritated Jess's you with him. You get right up to her. I don't think you're remember that we are in trouble before you are to it we are here before. Yes. What was that for. Run away. You run away to something good or away from something bad. Run away from us. It's my dad was head of it. What else is so bad about it. Just he hit you. And what do you think you do just hit you for the exercise or is it

because you've been bad first and then that when you do it so bad stayed out that night even if you were the father and he were the son he stayed out all night what would you do that you wanted to say. Do you think it's fair that nice fellow you don't like to get the weapon. Yes and how should he get along with your mother used her who's her favorite. My brother the one is home with you and the one that Sudan Hey he's your favorite. And who's your daddy's favorite. Me are you. But he hit you the what does he do to the ones he doesn't like. But my own is he nicer to them or a worse day it's not as much but maybe he likes you so much maybe that makes him real disappointed when you aren't good. You know maybe you're kind of his favorite and he expects more of you. You think expect more

Uni does of the other kids. Yeah you think you behave a little better if you didn't expect so much of you to know that you. Well you know I don't know what would have to change to make you better. Through an eye bending good too I learned after practice in the other kids. So you were good when you started toward some bad boys soon. I used to love felt a plug and then I will try one then I don't call after work I was playing better and then I went out there again what with a little trouble at the park. I stay out of the night with some other kids. What do you do or might want to stay out. Just go around and we are slowly being sleep someplace. Is that fun in there. I can do it for recently for months. So you have a little bit fun

yes but I guess a fun stops around 11 o'clock or so further and you sleep on the ground in this cold weather. I think that cold but it's called enough you have the blankets right. You know you sleep in your clothes or any girls in the gang right. Are you still in the age worked your all it's all boys you your friends your family girl friends. Yeah I want some girlfriends here and they get in trouble too. Do they seem any colder toward you when you're in trouble. They're just the same. They don't drop you because you get in trouble. And would you say you're your mother and father were affectionate with you kind. They like you.

Yes. How they surely have failed why do you think you spoiled it. Probably we had a baby sister and you were the baby too she was born and then you didn't like the idea she came along and did you what did you like you know just to have better now they treated her better and it makes it kind of hard for you to take especially now if you're spoiled and then somebody else can really start to spoil her. And they don't worry you so much anymore it's hard to give up your role. Because you're something like a king who doesn't have any soldiers and doesn't have any land. All right you know. And maybe you know to get to get back to get their attention and that maybe when you do some of these things you know you're afraid that you're not likeable for yourself so I think what you feel is that if I were the youngest they would like me but now there's somebody

younger they couldn't possibly like me just for myself they only like me because I was so young when I was a baby. You think what do you guess. Take a guess. I still like me. They do like sure I'm sure they do. But maybe it's a matter that they don't want is divided you don't want her to get some of the some that she can get somewhere that doesn't bother you when what do you have against you. Sorry just going in my stuff taken it. This is really body Rory is just annoying or is it really bother you real bad so you want to do something to it. I put stuff away next time I'm looking for you know her you ain't there. Say she doesn't have a cup there's a way I find it. What's your head off with at the school stuff in there. And what does this make you feel like doing to her can't you. And what do you do. Time to miss you big girl a

little slow global and you feel pretty good about it you punched this little girl in there. Do you really. When she cries I guess and then what happens. Close up my letter and then your mother she makes me clip it but he'd punish you then too or tell your father. No thank you. She's afraid of him too and if she'd run House Prema she'd boss us how she Bashi far comes away until as a said she didn't think she was homeless. But what about how she shows she's the boss and house and he's not. She gets all the money and that his money she had.

And yet he's he's your buddy isn't your mother in your body so much you little girl's heart or body. But in general it's not too bad. Unpleased at home as they say I don't like you and you like them. And what was the first time you were in here from running away that is the one that you just read only once and it was like oh man wake up times. Do you think if you were if you were the favorite of your mother and dad you would run away more. When you but what you maybe have to learn to do is share with her. You think that they don't love her and not you and I don't think you should want them to love you and not her. I think that they love both and. Probably are to be enough. You would want to see anything bad happen your lenses to leak you know because she's probably kind of nice.

And I mean maybe you know a lot of times you're not nice with her you do this really get your parents attention to us and away from her. Maybe the reason she takes your things is to get your attention to her maybe she really likes you because kids do tease each other you know and if you're not paying attention to a child very often she'll keep it up till she get your attention and she'd like you to like her but if you won't like her at least you'll have to notice or know why she may do these things she doesn't really keep them thus your distorted. Sometimes she does feel that what kind of stuff which she destroyed my books and then I have them says to them well do you think that maybe sometimes you do. You kind of don't take care of them too well so she can get at them. I have in my room. Yeah and she's not supposed winner. They say she goes in there get her baby dolls in it and she keeps him in your room. What is human around room. Mother doesn't want me just she sleeps in with your mother and she doesn't want her room cluttered up with the baby.

You're going to but you don't mind being a garage for baby died to get your room and I text a lot unless he messes it up again. How old is she. She better leavened. Well maybe if you tried be real nice to her maybe she you might see a big change in her. So what you've done so far is you beat her up you know every chance she get don't you. And how did that work to do to make her better. And she looked on my stuff I you know went out and it worked if. You had any other problems. You know that's about all. OK. You have been listening to exploring the child's world. A program in which the child speaks. Father Francis Duffy Professor of Sociology at Duquesne University has outlined the features of this world and conducted the

interview with the child. Now. This is been a production of the radio service of Duquesne University in cooperation with U.K. news sociology department. Technical director Fred McWilliams program director announcers are older man. Listen again next week for another in the series exploring the child's WORLD BEAT THE eat. Eat Eat Eat Eat was. This program was distributed by national educational radio. This is the national educational radio network.