Child beyond; Home away from home

The child beyond produced by Radio host the University of Texas under a grant from the Educational Television and Radio Center in cooperation with the National Association of educational broadcasters. You're. The child who is there beyond the hurt and the handicapped beyond the defect and the difference beyond the problem and its programming. There is a child. How can we reach. How can we set him free. Radio house the University of Texas brings you the child beyond a series of recorded programs devoted to the exceptional child in our society. His problem his areas of difficulty the avenues of adjustment open to him. To help us seek richer and more satisfying lives for our exceptional children and their

families. We have counseling with us on these programs. Authorities in the fields of medicine technology therapy special education and parents who have exceptional children in their own home. It is especially important for us to have both such professional and personal interests represented on this particular program. And here is our series commentator Dr. William G will tell us why. Thank you Bill. Many people with many skills and many viewpoints make a contribution to the welfare of the whole child. And it is with the whole child that we are concerned as as we go about this everyday business of living with our children exceptional or otherwise. This is not a case of deafness. It is a child. This is not a case of blindness. It is a child. We want to remedy the hurt and alleviate the handicap. We want to minimize the defect and reduce the difference. We want to solve the problem and cope with its manifestations. But how we go about these things and what we do

must be measured for success against one yardstick. What is best for the whole child. What will help him to live as his own best self within the limits of his own capacities. Whether we work with skilled knowledge as professional people or experience and love his parents. Let's hold fast to that yardstick. Let's remember to use it again and again as we consider today the child who may need institutional care the child whose destiny may spell itself out in a home away from home. What we find in. The middle years. Hello hello hello Mr. Marriott

printing Remington is calling this is she. This is Mrs. Blackburne speaking just a moment. BlackBerry. Hello Mr. Driver. Yes. Thought I had missed by running the track Holcroft growing first by all. Yes yes go ahead. Hello hello. Mr. Lott. Yes Mrs. Draper. Can I help you out sorry to call you in the middle of an I'd like to ask but I thought that it was weak. We left on the board. We left Johnny with you at the school this morning. You know yes Johnny and I spent a lot of time together today. Did you after we let how Mr. Blackburn You know I mean any cry or anything Johnny's going to get along very nicely Mrs. Draper Please try not to worry. We're going to take good care of your little boy I know you know it's not right it's just. I can't sleep. I've tried I've tried but I cry. So I got off a lot. I went to Johnny's

room. I do several times every night to be sure he's alright. And and he wasn't right. I'm sorry. Be my dear. This is the hardest time you will get better soon Lee it will. Oh I know I'm being awful calling you waking you up going on like you did wrong to me. It's just that Verity's it all seems so wrong. I thought you know if I thought I'm just very own mother and if I don't care enough about it to take care of it why should I expect other. But you do care enough you care enough to want what's best for Johnny. But that's what I can tell that's what I can't say anymore. What do you think. I just block but I've got to know in my own mind.

Are you sure we've done the right thing. Are you sure we've done the right thing. Are you really sure. That the hearts of our own to face institutional it isn't over and over again. Or even where reason and logic prevail the question preying upon hearts and feelings sorrow by worry and weariness. Over and over again that repeats itself sometimes dim sometimes lone and insistent. Right. Johnny Draper is an 8 year old boy whose mind will never grow beyond

it. He has been his mother's whole life. Now that life has been disrupted to forces not of her own. Sacroiliac sprain. Oh I'm not going to tape you up young lady but I want you in that bad on a map is barred for three days. Well you can get up to go to the bathroom but otherwise you stay put. Three days Dr. Brady but that's just impossible. Who's going to take care of Johnny. Meryl I have to get a maid Helen. You got to take it easy if you're going to get that back in shape. We can keep them a doctor Brady. They won't stay. Johnny doesn't want anybody else taking care of him any make such a fuss and that's no joke Doc we've had six maids in three weeks sent over a practical nurse. I know many a good one and she won't take any nonsense all the young. No I really don't think it would upset him so. And besides the expense. We can't do it now honey if doxing snow jam gets out

of the question. Do you think it over. And if you decide you want to have it over here and in the meantime take one of the tablets every four hours with plenty of water. Stay down as much as you can. All right. How try and quick lift in that boy you can do a lot for himself he's not gone and you're not going to have a back if you keep around the way you do. Well I got to run got five more folks to save or I can call it a day. I used a put on General Zinni out show well doc I'll be right back and if there's anything you need be all right. We sure appreciate your coming by Doc.. Glad to boy. Any time. Yeah we got to do something about that wife or yours Jim. But what are you going to do. She won't let anybody else do for Johnny won't go anywhere because he doesn't take the babysitter's won't let her mother come down on mine because they wouldn't understand Johnny.

I don't know Doc. It's a tough one. I was going to happen when she cracks up. Mighty of rage is going to then somebody will have to take over. There won't be time to plan a logjam. Have you ever thought of putting that cat of yours somewhere besides here at home. You mean in a special home somewhere or a school. Helen wouldn't hear to it Doc. Well maybe you better make her listen Jim. And then there's the money. I don't know how I'd swing it. Anything we get our heads got to go for college for Surely an all wouldn't have to be a Private schools on a state school maybe I don't even like that idea myself Doc. not for my boy. Somebodies boys are doing pretty well in some state schools Jim. Maybe you ought to go visit ours. Maybe I'd find it's got more than you think. Maybe you've got to think of Shirley em too. What's keeping this boy at home doing what for that matter is it doing to him to him. I don't getcha doc. Ever lose a race Jim or no matter how

hard you tried you couldn't keep up or even catch up. Mighty discouraging feeling. Yeah I guess it is then that's what's happened to Johnny all day every day. All the other youngsters all out I had to stay and I had nobody waiting for Johnny. Nobody's running alongside but how about Helen da cheese. Geez Brenda carry em Jim. It's not the same thing. It's one in her life and it's not helping his only thing that will help that boy is to put him where other folks are going at the same Clippy is where he's got a chance to keep up if you don't want to jam either he'll forget how to run already. Give up Ryan. And in either case you're going to wake up someday and find out that your boy is out of the running. Cool. Sure like some coke or something honey. That's a long hard drive I

never was so dry in my life. I'm afraid there isn't anything Jim Shirley and didn't get to the store today. How come. Well all morning she was helping me with Johnny. I don't know what's got into him. A temper tantrum every five minutes. Where is he now and where surely he's in the backyard. Surely and got him to play in the sand pile for a while and she's gone over to a little party of glorious glorious glorious Humboldt. They're the new people in the house that backs up to be on the fence. Yeah I'm glad the little gal got out for a while. She's been tied mighty close to home here these last few months. I know I worry so about that. But what can I do. Johnny's getting so big and he's so hard to handle when he's in one of his tempers. I just can't manage him by myself. Of course you've got honey we've just got to figure some way out of this deal. Look Helen I brought home some stuff some booklets and things and I've been writing some letters. Why don't you and I sit down tonight.

I. Surely thought you went to a party angel face she did. What happened dear. Wasn't the party today. Yes yes it was today. I just thought it was time for me to go. Surely you've just been there for 30 minutes. I I guess I don't know. Yeah yeah. Nothing. Don't ask me please. But if it's something we can fix nothing to anybody not anybody had surely Johnny. He's out there in the backyard acting you know kids at the party. They didn't. Know my brother. They were. Even making. The Morley did the worst. I couldn't. Write. It. Helen please will you try to get hold of yourself can't we just talk about this.

How can you ask me to talk about it. How about giving my son oh he's my son too honey. But how can you think about it. About dumping him off on strangers in an institution for the rest of his life. He's got a life too you know. And what kind will it be the what kind is it here honey nobody to play with but you and me and Charlie can't go anywhere. People stare at him they don't want him around can't play in his own backyard without being teased and taunted like an animal. Do you know what kind of life is it for the rest of us. You exhausted sick in tears half the time. Surely I am humiliated heartbroken afraid to go anywhere ashamed to have her friends over. And how about me. I don't have a wife anymore I've got a nurse maid a 24 hour a day nurse maid who spends all her time taking care of my son. I take care of Johnny because I love him. Is it so wrong to love your own son I think it is. I think it's wrong when it's selfish and devouring when it cut you off from loving anybody else. When it blinds you to what you're doing to Johnny in the name of love. Well I'm not going to let you do it Helen. I am not going to let you do what you are doing to any of us to Shirley or me or to

Johnny or to yourself. Do you mean when you talk. Thing about I've been talking to Dr. Brady how he's found a place for Johnny a swell place where they can give him the kind of life he needs to have where he can go at his own pace with other children who are like he is where people who know how can teach him to do things for himself. We're going up there Tuesday Helen up their way to this and take Johnny take Johnny and leave him there. Leave it at that. At that school or home if that's the way you'd rather think of it because that's what it will be honey. That's the way it'll make it easier for you to think of it. Just think of it as Johnny's home away from home. And that's the way Johnny Draper went to his home away from home. That's the way Johnny Draper

went to a private school for Exceptional Children. Measuring with a yardstick we mentioned at the first of our program measuring what Johnny needed for his development as as a whole child against what the school had to offer. We can in many instances find no fault with the fact that he went. But there is question on two points. He went before his mother had fully accepted his going and he went on money his parents could not spare for that purpose. So the phone call came in the middle of the night signaling distress and guilt and indecision and surely a man did not get to go to college. Now Could these questions have been resolved. Could Helen Draper have gone father toward acceptance of institutional care for his son if for instance someone had counselled with her as Dr Iyer Isco University of Texas psychologist is counseling with her now. Mrs. Draper what I have to say will not be pleasant for you but I feel you should know that the results of our comprehensive

medical and psychological examination Plus our extensive observations of Johnny all point to the fact that this is a case of mental retardation and we feel that he would be better off in a limited type of environment. Oh I was hoping you wouldn't say that. What do you mean by limited environment all these phrases. What's wrong with a home environment. It's pretty difficult for a mother to take. What I mean by a limited environment is the place where the demands upon him will not be too great where the pressure will be minimal and where there are people who are trained and capable of meeting his needs. I'm thinking specifically of a private or a public institution.

Oh no. How can a place like that replace my love for him as his mother. There's actually no substitute for a mother's love or for a home that matter. Johnny's been with you for eight years. You've given him a lot of love. Let's for a moment take a look at what's happened. I suppose you could tell me how does he get along in the neighborhood. Well he gets along just fine the children the children like him they play with him Nate. I think he gets along very well. Do children actually have his own age call for him and ask him to come out and play WoW. No but there's nothing wrong with that is there. He seems to be happy. I really frankly doubt it he's extremely happy I doubt that any child is real happy when children of his own age. I would not call for him but be that for as it may for the moment. What about the girl Shirley Ann. How was she getting along.

Well she seems to be getting along very well as she sees a smart girl and and she seems to love her brother and she likes to take care of him. Well I'm not disputing that she loves her brother or would love to take care of him but isn't there times that his demands get in the way of certain legitimate things that she wishes to do. Wow I could be but so what. Doesn't she sometimes show some resentment towards him. Well I don't think she shows any more resentment than any other girl would show toward her little brother. And you feel then that she really isn't impeding surely and progress. No I really don't think I really don't think it is. I well know. How about the relationships between you and your husband. Do you spend a terrific amount of time with Johnny you must because he is rather helpless. Do you have enough time to fulfill the other duties around the home. Yes I believe that I do and surely I am and my

husband seemed to understand. Your husband never displays any impatience or anything well at times of course. Well from what you told me at least from his point although I think you're being a little defensive. Nonetheless let's look at Johnny himself since it's his well for that we're concerned with is he perfectly happy at home. Well he has temper tantrums now man of course but I just I just don't think I think he's happier at home than he would be away from home or away from me. What do you think these temper tantrums are due to. Oh I don't know. Frustration I suppose of some sort. I think you're on the right track. What do you think the frustration is coming from. While I don't know I'm not a doctor. Well usually when children are frustrated it's because they cannot do certain things in the environment and frequent temper tantrums.

Most likely a mentally retarded child meaning that the even the press of a loving home is too much that he can't meet the demands. And maybe he wants to go outside the home. Well it's easy for you to sit up there and say that Dr but I've been with Johnny for 8 years he's my child. What do you expect me to do just take him to that school and leave you with those freaks. No Mrs. Draper I would be very disappointed in you as a mother if you said OK I'll place in there. I understand your feelings and the heartbreak in this matter. It's not easy to take. You would no doubt have a feeling that if you were to leave him in the hands of what you consider now to be strangers that you'd be failing in your duty as a mother's neck drew. Yes I do. There's a time factor here. What I've said has been pretty hard on you and I don't think that just in this one session we could clarify all these points. If you wish I would be pleased to

set up further appointments for you were both you and your husband could come and we could talk about the total situation and particularly in the shaping of realistic plans not only for the moment but for where this boy will be five and ten years from now and for where this boy will be when you are no longer in a position to afford him the protection and type of environment that you do now. Well obviously I had to come back and talk to you and I hope you can make me see the advantages I certainly can't see the doctor but I'll certainly talk to my husband and we'll make an appointment to come back fine whenever you're ready. Would you call and I'd be glad to give you at least a few more appointments so we can talk this over. Would such a help have made the decision easier for Helen Draper and could Jim have prevented Shirley and sacrifice if we had talked first to someone like Mr. Raymond Bell superintendent of the also state school. Might a discussion such as this have so

surely on the college. Mr. Draper it's real pleasure to have you visit with us and I'd be happy to try to answer any questions that you may have. Our friend Dr. Brady told me that you had me by to see me. That's right Mr. Vidal I wanted to see you after he had more or less convinced me that Johnny would become considerable problem to us later on and I felt it necessary to see you and get some information I am interested. The one thing in knowing what your admission requirements are for him to enter here or what it would cost me. We had met children on application and secure all the medical social and psychological data that we can. Children six mentally retarded six years of age and older are eligible. The cost is based on a sliding scale to pay depending on your ability to pay. I do not believe that we have over charge anyone.

While I think that would be a considerable relief to us to keep us aware of the situation that I would like also to know something about do you have any training programs for these children anything to help them. Or educate them. Training is a primary function of the school for the mentally retarded Mr Draper. Training the child for whatever role in life he will play when he and I had dealt with it me and the community are in the institution. He would be placed in whatever training facility that we felt that he could benefit from. I like to feel that Johnny might have some advantage there or what about his medical care. Who looks after him we have full time physicians and there is one always on duty that is that night as well as day call. What about his day to day attention. We help house parents or attendants. That look after the boys and

girls on a 24 hour basis someone is always on duty in the knowledge or would we be able to visit him at any time if he should be here. This is an institution so far as we concerned belongs to the people thats always open to the public and we have a sting every day. You may visit him morning or afternoon on his building taking home for a vacation. Are we really even discharging that your request. Well I feel like I would like some thing from you about assuring my wife how well he would be taken care of here. She of course objects to his being separated from us. Perhaps I'm a little hard for you and your wife to understand but often times children are actually happier in this type of institution than they are at home. Here they Leo was other children of their own mental ability. They can compete with

their peers. They are successful at times and we all like to be successful and they seem to enjoy life here quite a bit. There are many recreation and recreational activities for them to engage in. While the picture that you have given me sounds very fine and I certainly would like to have my wife come back with me and talk to you if it's necessary to convince her I would like to do that. I mean while I'm here if you don't mind I'd like to look around the grounds of your school. I'd very much like for MS Draper to come in with cause I think it's always necessary for parents to arrive at this decision together. Now while you're here today I'd be happy to show you the Dhamma tours and try to point out that one. Here again is our series commentator Dr. William G Wolfe professor of educational psychology at the University of Texas director Austin cerebral palsy center and

well-known lecturer in the field of special education. The problems that Draper's face are common to many families. Other families have still other problems. There is for example the dilemma facing parents of a child with normal or superior intelligence who exhibit serious emotional disturbance whatever the circumstances to decide in favor of institutional care for their child is one of the most difficult and harrowing decisions conscientious parents can be called upon to make. It is a decision to be reached only with care and with time with skillful and sympathetic guidance in the consideration of all its aspects. Those whose knowledge has been gleaned from experience with many children must dedicate that knowledge to those whose deep concern is with the welfare of one child and always in considering institutional care for Exceptional Children. In reinforcing our decision we must make constant reference to our

yardstick. What is best for the whole child not only today but in the tomorrows to come. Where can we most effectively help him to live as is own best self. Is that at home. Is his own home or is it in a home away from home. Home away from home was brought to you by radio host University of Texas. That's the town in a special series of programs titled Beyond these recorded broadcasts are devoted to the exceptional children in our society discussing the aspect of institutional care for Exceptional Children. University of Texas psychologist and Mr. Raymond the superintendent of the Austin State School our series commentator is Dr. William home away from home as prepared for broadcast by Jack Summerfield from a script by the Durham twins a special music by play Adkins with Project Coordinator. ANNOUNCER child beyond was produced

by Radio hosts of the University of Texas under a grant from the Educational Television and Radio Center. This program is distributed by the National Association of educational broadcasts. This is the end network.