Sex and Christian Responsibility; 1; Cultural Effects on Sex Mores

we have all been very much pleased by the response in terms of persons who have registered for this course on sex and christian responsibility last when we began to think in terms of the course is for the current year which kept coming back again and again to the need of song on redefining the sexual problems of sex in the second term for a delight of many new writings that were coming out on your taxes come on how long held moral values so fortunately we were having within our own committee as a prominent member of the committee does is terrence malick uses elliott has done a great deal of study on two years on the problem of sex and the role that our saxon life seven years ago wrote a book that is still red and field a section and christian chants about it and this course began to entry per and file a plot twisting on gently he began to we learned and so that she would agree to head up the committee and as she began to think about what she wanted in the way of the committee silent began to realize that what she would really felt most comfortable

in doing would be to lead these four sessions herself and we were all very pleased to have her lead a course on sex impression responsibility for these four sundays it's at this term with great pleasure that i introduce ms harrison ballot to lead us in this four sessions on sex and fish responsibility in the attempt in the series to make a frank honest search for responsible christian attitude and action in the realm of sex we shall be less concerned with the evils you to sex and to its potential for the enrichment of life we're aware that there's something lacking in mores which no longer gain a cent from those who are most involved for us to blame those who no longer accept the former

codes made the interstate from the need for a frank evaluation of the ethics we profess or the counseling we have given we shall not blame individual parents for the behavior of their children or the church for not having the answers to the questions in this area both parents and church are part of a culture that has not yet been able to integrate its discoveries in anything else with its former dallas and in the area of sex has reduce the disparity between insects codes and the behavior of those who voted for the first time you know several thousand years of sexual abstinence and the double standard and only temporarily question that seems to be increasingly down society is less like the

man who cannot ignore the challenge says it originated in itself it is so strongly kind of the press that is not certain whether it wants to or is able to change we are a society that sprout between the specific absolutes of a victorian and puritan ethics and relativity that allows ever want to do as he feels right for himself a culture where as fox says exhortations to individual components are almost as useless as urging businessman to us to the prophet know now there may be those who feel that this kind of frank and honest attitude will not be possible in the church a discussion here is useless because those in the church cannot look and judge mentally sex practices however pierre burton's the drastic critic of the canadian shirt

says in his book the comfortable pew there was an age when many of the major protestant sects the lead as one or two of the minor ones do the dancing even many law was a practice as a human was innocent as the paula jones was indescribably simple and that those who practiced this lustful relationship would suffer for all eternity the same routes now dancing church halls at night in ways that would have caused them formerly who'd been driven from the community there was a time i'm guessing was looked upon with equal severity a christian woman yes a man only as a seal to an engagement today the church does not frowned upon is and as it once did many churches that now hold hardly favor the ideal family planning a mechanical means or was as wholeheartedly against it as the roman church seems to be

in this series we're not expecting to enunciate in four weeks a new sex morality or to have a riverside view of sex to parallel the english i carried you on which a group of educators were six years instead it is to face and accept responsibility as parents teachers counselors ministers to make a frank open and responsible search to discover what may help those who are young or not so young to find a relevant quote valves for the expression of sex in their lives we know we cannot go back to former codes or make a new one to try to formulate specific absolutes is to fail to allow for the individual uniqueness a variation which is necessary for christian attitude toward christians on the other

hand to try to use that criteria integrity or responsibility often gives us no specific help on the decisions individuals this may and we know the complete relativity gives us no basis for chocolates and hence is no basis for freedom so as president that sets when the specific absolutes are no longer an eternity there is a real danger of moral chaos because he's so easy to be swept away by the claimant desires and tempting circumstances regardless of intelligible considerations and rationalize whatever we find ourselves doing the situation seems to be that for a large part of the population the specific absolute have lost their power unless there is an exploration of other grounds for moral choice then

are more than this guy has pressure in behalf of to boost many will be left without any relevant guidance the end of the boat in the first hour we should look at the cultural situation in which we find ourselves to see briefly some of the factors that have brought about what we deplore or whatever a possible new dimensions of human experience we should look to see which of our former assumptions we have made in our counseling are the result of questionable cultural patterns rather than a culture that rather than a christian convictions we shall try to avoid any generalizations that as a sex problem but try to see the teen age and colleague young people in the world in which they live understand some of the pressures under which they find themselves and try to face some other questions which we as adults must answer if we

are to be of all your parents whose daughters are in college may need to read sex and the college girl and not because it is a picture of all college girls or are there particular dollar but to know the climate of opinion into which their daughter will go the accuracy of this account another any statistics which have to do with sexual behavior is not at this point an important we need them to give us a realistic picture of the pressures of modern life and to see where some of our past thinking is irrelevant in the second session we should look at the place of sex in the lives of men and women of homosexuality as well as heterosexuality and those of you who did you listen to many of our series on the homosexual a new monarchy

will find much that is relevant or thinking in the third session we shall see how we made up individuals find their own code about you see the relation of a conceptual as over against illegally stick epic look at the meaning of chastity and the experience requisite for free joints in the fourth we shall try to see how we here at riverside may be more helpful before question which was passed when i did marriage counseling to pet or not to pet or deny or not america has now become the bed or not the bed and is focused primarily on premarital sex relations in the answer to this question of pre marital relations we have three states

want a standard of abstinence which forbids intercourse outside marriage for both men and women sat in the age old double standard which holds the man they indulge in pre marital intercourse with women may not the standard is self contradictory says only a violation by women to make it possible for may third ace bandage which expects premarital intercourse is right for both men and women and this theory is divided into those first two except pre marital intercourse only one there is a stable relationship with engagement or strong affection president and those who accepted or course when there is the cycle of traction regardless of the amount of stability or affection both bobby's permitted

standards are in violation of our formal code of abstinence but are nevertheless that once accepted by large groups of individuals and those which we must consider if we ask about premarital relationships either with what meaning without consequence is it's right under certain circumstances and not under others now for a bright very brief survey of the present seem studies indicate that over one hand authors marriages the brides are in their teens one of these three marriages ends in divorce forty one percent of illegitimate children are born to teen age mothers approximately one

fourth of all high school girls and one half of students in college and have sexual relationships these statistics include girls in all classes of society including girls in those families who have great concern for the welfare of their daughters and i might say that these facts i knew only in their prevalence in every small town they're been forced marriages and illegitimate children contraceptive information office are mainly incorrect is available to more and more people i heard one group of girls who considered seven up to be a contraceptive mandate

the numbers of abortions that arrogance occurring and the number and the amount of ignorance about the hazards of the methods used are causing growing concern the near your disease is on the increase especially in eleven for fifteen page right as max stier says in his introduction to sex in college girl sexually life has been sharply of celery the grandmother gender begins early once girls most traded at fourteen now the average has dropped to thirteen the college tour of the day is probably play post office of mixed parties and nine began dating for an action movies at ten heather here down once a week at the neighborhood beauty parlors by twelve has gone steadily at least by thirteen suffered from a broken heart like thirteen an order she has

had no turn to be a chapter in the words of a colleague here parents are so worried that their kids aren't going to get dates and that and they want to push them in the dating and sex and wearing bras their mothers want them to be attracted to boys and it's just too young to push them in they should wait until they are at least in the cave and nine read it is what is happening to so large a percentage of teenage boys and girls calls for serious consideration by parents teachers or those responsible for what dr mays calls the unique and nationwide custom updating he deplores the pairing off a boys and girls before senior high school for social events since the dating

he's being forced down precipitously at the same time that the sexual stimulus in all life are being dangerously intensified and as the freedom according the court hughes has become greater and greater he says in a culture saturated with sectoral sexual suggestions anyone who i'm matt ends the immature teenagers can be put together in pairs in the privacy of the couple are un chaperoned places and not indulge in sex experiment is just not being realistic one of the questions to be taking into account setting the time teenagers come home for many of them is what equipment they have to stay out their biological is equipment that at that point is available when they have nothing to do or to talk about

together and if the day refuses to use that her companion they say is that one high school boy you can't talk a new octet let's go home doctor mrs proposed in an article in mccall's magazine let's abolish baiting under sixteen and abolish it in favor of group activities to which individuals do not come or go home as couples and in which there's another planned activity to make for a wholesome experience this kind of solution cannot be used by the individual parent in relation to his individual child to ask a child to behave differently from his peers may have serious emotional consequences but it could be achieved by a group of mothers and teachers in any great who would plan together and take responsibility for the activities of the occasion our legal cold

makes punishable with varying degrees of severity be about who contributes to the delinquency of a minor a judge in darien help parents and teachers guilty percent contribution in the case of a fatal accident to a girl driven by a boy who had like a drink at a party in one of the home is equally plausible are the parents who relieved teen agers with our chapter image at a party in their home it is not sound to consider the teenagers are capable of disappointing one another they need the ak party they flock into words but equally great there will be more cars hotel and fraternity houses and apartments loan for the week and as the adolescent grows older but the first

introduction the sexual experience that happens in them up not to be in parental roles and we desperately need to do something to close the gap in communications between adults and young people again which is always been there in the area of sex communication and is not accentuate in by the permissiveness the parents and their own lack of standards if the standards they can ban that practice in secret they not only do not communicate our leading ally usually is all too likely to discover you as always had ways of asserting independence cox reminds us and this is in the chapter in the secular senate which many of you there reminds

us are cutting the hair and smoking were flags of independence performer generation sex intimacy is for the president juan playboy is a symbol of what it is to be a man and miss america of the gear and vote for it and there are subjected to more skillfully and dried parade of sex stimulants than ever before if we are to be helpful to any individual we need to help him or her to understand what he's doing only as she discovers and i'm using the feminine pronoun instead it will only as she discovers that only she discovers what she's really doing is she able to

know what she really wants and there's no one who wants to miss out the various kinds of sexual activity of the young are ways of establishing identity and maybe the result of many different motivations teenage sexual intercourse pregnancy or marriage may be the result of a biological urge which gets out of hand or it may be the need for a deep emotional attachment and search for emotional security and sympathetic understanding from her study which she didn't find in her home it may be a search for release from the tensions of the home where her parents alternate between over protecting us and unjustified demands it may be a way of rebuilding from or

punishing parents it may need to make a party go efficiency is it maybe to make sure the boy will marry her it may be the line of least resistance are the price she pays for the date next year says she is determined to belong fearful of being like the kind of the boys by rival girls by fun by popularity by marriage by like she plays a crew that is she tries not to allow herself to get involved emotionally with any man she has discarded the traditional moral absolutes and is living in a world of relativity that for that frees her from the all restraints that leaves her medically floundering with

little sense of laments and rob may says young people plan clean the premature intimacy because they are afraid that our relationship in our insecurity age when all values are in flux at least the study is a steady always having the same fella or girl available always the anxiety of aloneness they also exploring this leads naturally and laugh the early sexuality it is a strange thing that in our society what goes into building a relationship and sharing of fantasies dreams hopes for the future

seems to make people more shockingly vulnerable i'm going to be a teacher they are more wary of the tenderness that goes with psychological and spiritual nakedness then they are a physical nakedness in sexual intimacy we have been concerned to provide sexual information and some of it has been incorporated into agency and school kerr thank you for a minute we're coming into a new awareness of the interrelationship an interaction of the body mind an environment in all aspects of manslaughter i'm uneasy with greater clarity

that man's sexual life is he intimately to all three of these factors sexual processes are broadly factories but their uniqueness lies in the extraordinary complexity and death of the interconnections they have with the mind and with the emotions normal sexual functioning requires a profound involvement all and even balancing between body mind and emotions any one of the three may have given times exercise dominance this variation is what a forum sexual experience its infinite variety but the cuts did dominance of any one of these three elements almost promises some kind of sexual this location

and one might remark that what appears to be teenage sophistication may if not that appears to be a teenage circus in many if not most teenagers the five we find slowing the ignorant about the facts of sexual intercourse and its consequences and in this area it is not good enough for parents to learn what they do not now from their children it may be more important to make available sex education for parents and her job we have come to recognize that what we

have helped to be sexual enlightenment he's not seem to make for freedom for fulfillment for most people language it would once have prompted a lady to burst into tears or to leave the room now on tonight's cocktail chatter there are few miles without some seen describing a sex act but the result is an artist brian do not give an image of fulfillment but often a violation or punishment but feelings for trade are not those of fulfillment they're doing this for years it is as if they were commenting on the biblical statement god gave them their requests but senate leaders and of their souls

an article in time magazine closes with a statement the victorians talked a great deal about love and knew little about sex it may be time for the americans to talk less about sex and more about the law rowe may says there are three huge strange and interesting dilemmas in which we find ourselves in respect to sex and love in our society when psychoanalysis was born in victorian times a half century ago repression of sexual impulses feelings and interests was the acceptable mode of the day it was not nice to feel sexual one would not talk about sex in polite society and an aura of repulsive thats surrounded the whole top then in the nineteen

twenties a radical change occurred almost overnight but police became a militant conviction in liberal circles that the opposite to repression namely sex education freedom of talking feeling and expression should have a healthy affects animals and obviously the only stand by the enlightened person partly as a result of this radical change week there is rarely get in our offices anymore patients who complain of repression in the old sense we find just the opposite in the people who come for help a great deal of talk about sex a great deal of sexual activity practically no one complains in any culture of prohibitions over he's going to bed as often or with as many parties as he wishes but what are

haitians complain now is a lack of feeling and pension so much sex and so little meaning more fun in it whereas the victorian person i didn't want anyone to know you're human sexual feelings now we're seeing that we don't external social anxiety has less but internalize anxiety and guilt have increased and in some ways these are more morbid and impose a heavier burden on the individual man or woman anxiety the second amendment is that now the new emphasis on techniques insects and lovemaking have backfired the emphasis beyond a certain point context means insects makes forum at the mistake attitude toward love making and goes along with

alienation feelings of loneliness and the personalization their dilemma is that are highly sexual freedom in my judgment has turned out to be a new form of puritans the victorian person saw to have love without falling into sex the modern person seeks to have sex without falling lindelof bit we've cut they have complicated our understanding of the place of sex in behavior by associating it with what is evil rather than with what is good or bad person that in quotes a bad person is not one who lies or cheeks but the one who has violated some part of the sexual coleman a you are excommunicated priests

defrocked for a private entity the slums barco has a part not for sexual mistakes immorality in popular speech almost always means sexual immorality and living in sin means irregular cohabitation that last sentence is a quotation from alan watts it really separation the body and spirit and the depreciation of sex of the early church fathers has plagued us through the centuries and maybe forgot the integration of sex into our cultural behaviorist bandits we are slow to understand the good person cannot be the sexless individual or the one whose so called someone nation is to the repression of his sexual nature but rather the person whose sex is most

completely integrated into his total like the sexual act it's one of the highest and most meaningful explorations but he's mean there's something high or holy something that they're a narco is that something to be ashamed of it is an organic function to be used in the service of love if we make a clean up port to be kept separate from the ordinary functions of the line to be mentioned only in whispers if it is exalted romantically or be based with feelings of content and if we do one we do the other at the same time you want sex a woman on a pedestal to assert her inferiority and so insult her humanity if one singles out sex as something very

wonderful or terrible he merely exasperate sit and makes it and control a lot to carry a victorian prudery went to rome and his asian assets which was likewise a failure to face reality it may well be that marriage has failed in many cases not because one expected to little albeit of a sexual element in it but because one expected too much it may have been asked to carry too heavy a burden of weight which in other days carried it for ed is not dissimilar on them a marriage success and infidelity is not the only cause of divorce used by new york state divorce laws sex is needed but there are our salvation our damnation a sense of

you are essential to maturity in the evaluation of any aspect of life makes ed white and there's little pamphlet is sex necessarily a useful not in their own renovation and sex which there are called pedestals there's a witch it is the main gods and goddesses of human partners also tends to make them become devils and their homes tents the evils of the kinsey reported been attributed to a loss of sense of sanctity of human marriage however to expect sex to provide a mystical union that partnered to be accountability the home to heaven is to saddle up with a test

for which is by nature young people eat such a casual survey on the situation replaced must have its so why if we do not believe in high school marriages or element genesis how can we got chain the factories across it could we prevent rather than encouraged at the four sixteen should high schools allow the anger of a return to school after the baby's born here legitimately are and what attitude shall we hold for the divorce of those who marry before they can know whether the marriage will destroy their growth for its maturity lowery says her belief in abstinence or permissiveness

marital relationship they get any better than the ones in the past should the current expel the individual who has been caught having sex relations or the girl who is pregnant should the college doctor our clinic make the pill available but those who are not married new york times magazine ran an article some weeks ago on this subject twelve hundred christian students in and the family spent hours discussing a resolution should pre marital chastity be an ideal we need to examine what was the matter not with the students but with a question is the answer word and the

yes or no on their real pro and then i come back to what bacteria calderon says in one of the articles you hear we must bear in mind that our present situation has never before existed in the world universal population precious mobility tensions and fears we cannot apply any previously known solution to our problems must but must develop new ones for this reason i find very significant a remarkable young woman i believe that the young people of my generation have been

thrown into a situation where they have to do the experiment again and undergo the suffering from which the young people are of succeeding generations and draw their own conclusions and then we are now to the place where sincere individuals who do not accept the former colts may be able to a value of their experience maybe this is one of the most truthful lines all approach to understanding heart