American Radio Company of the Air; 1991-02-23; Part 1

From Minnesota Public Radio. [Garrison Keillor sings Tishomingo Blues] From the Bronco Bowl here in Dallas, Texas, Minnesota Public Radio pleased to present the American radio company. With our guests, the Dixie Chicks, Johnny Gamble out of the Austin [inaudible] with Tom ?Keith?.

Made possible by the American Booksellers Association for the additional funding provided by this public radio station. Oh, it's good to be in Dallas. Check out. Way out in New York City, the buildings touch the sky. I don't know anybody Loha. I'm just to move through. Who's lucky? Running after. I'm the. I feel I'm falling how to play. Man in the middle of talk

and get X marks, the spot I can get for. They said, oh, you're in the middle of right in the middle. And that is exactly where we met. My home for me was Star. You don't kiss the guy on the rear end in the middle at. You wear my extra back, your dreams have all come true. OK, I got to dance here.

Pardon me. And shuffle and turn and dip and turn. And promised I would ask you why, but you don't. I mean, I love where my. Dreams come true. They all came true right here, Ivy Austin, thank you. Derek. Hey, it's great to be here. We are a live broadcast for you from the Bronco Bowl here in Dallas, Texas. I always love to come and see Texas because I always have a good time here without really

knowing why, you know, all of my biases really run against Texas and I'm sort of prejudiced against Texans. And when I come here, I mean nothing but nothing but good people. We want to come here to because the radio station here in Dallas, quiara, is one of the best radio stations in the entire world. It's one of those cutting edge radio stations, you know, that plays all different kinds of music, so many public radio stations, they live back in the 18th century. They play so much baroque music that upscale furniture stores use them as sound systems. But Quiara plays rock and roll and blues and songwriters of all kinds and stripes and country music and rock and roll and everything else. And they are so great and we're glad to be here for them. Our show tonight is coming to you from the Bronco Bowl, which

is an auditorium attached to a bowling alley right on the other side of that wall. There are 70 to count them, 72 lanes. There are 31 one pool tables. There are some archery lanes and some golf tees, and there are several batting cages. Our guys stand up to bat against the against the machine. And there are some tables where old guys sit and play dominoes. This is the tackiest place that we've ever done, Michelle. There are limits to good taste, friend. When I reached mine a long time ago, we've done this show for so, so many times in these majestic, renovated old theaters and it's good to be here. There's the backdrop back here is a kind of a blue plastic, which is

a kind of blue plastic you would put over your woodpile at home unless your neighborhood was zoned against that shade of blue. And there are deep marks and gouges on this stage where where bands have done concerts here that were intended to release male violence, there are deep marks made here by young men in their 20s throwing beer bottles and goodness knows what else. If it weren't for heavy metal, they would have had to put them in cages. So that's where we are. We're so pleased to be here. And here's a song that I doubt was ever performed in the Bronco Bowl before. You're from big deal. I can get by the way, you told them the way you dress, you're from Big Smile, I mean, Big Little and that spelled

Dallas, my darling, darling Dallas. Did they give you pleasure to confess that you're from big my. Well, yeah. I mean, big deal. Yes, and that sells dollars for every home has to. Well, right now, my I mean, the little bit feeling like I'm letting. You're from big deal. I didn't get, by the way, it and the way you. You're from Big Day, my oh, yes, I mean, big day, we're like Dallas from Dallas and.

Big, big, big, big deal for Dallas. I mean it with no time around. From LA, my money, 50, 50, 50 years. Look back, my God. La la, la, la, la, la, la.

I play along the. And right around the. The cowboy. Been. W o o. Down in Florida. And

that's where we are really in the heart, you know, down here in Dallas to New York, to Maryland, Olympic tennis with the Broadway local theater, talking talk and loose talk here about, uh, about young men being put in cages where young men are wild, going to these heavy metal concerts. But it's one of the few places where young men can excel over women, is in getting drunk and throwing beer bottles around on stage. And they're not a lot of things that men can do anymore that women cannot do. Not really much. Women are in the army and operating backhoes, competing in kickboxing tournaments and everywhere, accomplishing and moving ahead in fields that men used to control. But one thing remains a male preserve, and that is packing luggage into a car.

The one thing that men do better than women. And right now here on stage, we're going to bring out this late model Chevy Chase here. We're going to open it up the trunk here and bring out Richard Muni's with five Samsonite suitcases and two big garment bags here. Richard, some groceries in this fragile gift to be careful and pack it in as a piece of cake. All right. No way. Forget it. This luggage is going to fit Trixie. And you know why? Because I'm a guy and I'm a leader. But first, we got to take out the spare tire and the tire iron here. Now, most women look at luggage and think horizontal, say, guys, you know how to use the vertical space so you will load these suitcases handles up. Now, just flatten this garment bag under the rear dash. Yeah. And fill in around the sides with the groceries. And let's open this other comment bag up here and stuff the shirts and socks next to the taillight cables and shut the trunk.

Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. He did it. Why are men still the leaders when it comes to doing what you did here? Well, packing stuff done a lot of research on that question. And the answer is because there were guys. OK, fair enough. What about the spare tire? You're going to drive without a spare tire, just like you to point that out, isn't it? Listen. Part of being a guy is hopeless optimism, Ivy. And that's why men also do better than women at eating red meat like this. And in connection with that, men are also leaders in performing heart bypass surgery. How are you feeling? Oh, you'll be under intense seconds and then we'll open up the heart and replace the bad part with some stuff from your legs. But what I'm here for a facelift. You're going to need this eventually, so it might as well get it out of the way now.

Oh, there's nothing wrong with your face. Men, complicated people you think you know, but maybe you don't. Guys look sad and kind of obtuse, but guys are still leaders. Leadership is something that guys are good at. Yes, you're right. Guys are guys able to talk. That's what we're going to go to the music right now. Thank you. Many men you meet are just exactly as they look. There you are in the area. You can read them like a book. But most are mysterious and absolute surprise. Most guys are in the sky. For example, this guy here, he looks a little dance. You don't see the fires burning fervent and intense. You can't see the passion raging in those watery eyes. Most guys are in the sky. And so we see to it's just a mask we wear,

just take off our suit and tie, you find the cowboy. There was one man night. You hear that wild ride? Those guys are. This guy. MusicI. We're in Dallas, Texas, very much alive tonight here at the at the Bronco Bowl down Dallas, Texas, is a city that has a lot of signs downtown green signs that say arts district on them with arrows pointing straight ahead.

We kept following them, but we didn't find it, but. That's a good idea. We don't have that in New York, you know, and in New York, artists just kind of leak out all over everywhere. But here in Dallas, they keep them in one area where you keep an eye on. And that's what artists want, you know, is to be watched. So it's a good idea. It's a city where you find the red beans and rice on on regular menus, not in the fancy cafes, but just regular regular places. You're talking about talking about Dallas, Texas. There was a steakhouse, um, steakhouse here where they had two cuts of the of the prime rib and they had the Fort Worth cut was the fifteen ninety five cut and the Dallas cut was the nineteen ninety five. They just take every chance they can get to stick it to those people. Isn't that something you some take something puny and name it after your arrival. It's just.

That's unusual, some of the greatest musicians come from Texas, Stevie Ray Vaughan and Jimmy Vaughan and all these great blues people, and Willie Nelson and Bob Will. Buddy Holly and all these great ones, and Johnny Gimble comes from the. They just got a new record out called Still Fiddling Around, and many years, some years, a few years after he started his performing career at the age of nine, playing at a station in Tyler, Texas, called CGC, be kind of good and kind of bad behavior. With a band called the Rose City Swing Street, where did you learn all that? I've just been listening to you read what I said, you know? Oh, what are you going to do here, John?

I want to play with this big orchestra. I can't imagine this 16 piece band and a fiddler and a drummer musicians and a fiddler and a drummer. Here we are with them. Bob Wills tunes about the back. During World War Two. They had a national anthem in Texas called a San Antonio Rose. And we're got do a couple of San Antonio songs home in San Antonio and San Antonio Rose, if you'll start us, Professor. I haven't got over I haven't got a care,

I haven't got a thing to call my own. Oh, I'm out of money. I'm a millionaire. I still have my home in San Antonio. And when I read my name with whether how you all I'm will as a king on a throne. You can have the mansions take that cottage. No, I'll just take that home in San Antonio. Deep within my heart lies a melody,

a song of old San Antonio. We're in dreams, I live with a man who live beneath the stars all alone. If I was there, I found inside the limo enchantment strange as it blew up above the boulevard that only she would know. Here's my broken song. No, no, no. Know my heart. Come back tomorrow and so sweet. And I cannot follow that path once again. Love, my love, my love broken down into words I know live in my heart alone and that moonlit path you sat down and Rose Miralles Santo. Thank you very much, John. Johnny Gamble.

Well, to John Young, John, he has a son who's a bass player, Dick, and now he has a granddaughter, her granddaughter, who's going to be a fiddler, is that right? How old is she? Is she is five now, I believe. And she's already playing variations on Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. It sounds good. Can you play variations on Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star? No, I want her to show me and how she keeps tuning a string down on my fiddle and won't tell me which one it is. So, yeah, it's all right. Let's come in here with a little bit of educational radio here and time once again for their great moments in history. Reenacted for radio by the American Historical Radio Repertory Company of the air, bringing to life once again those thrilling moments when the moving finger wrote in the tide of history rose. And there they were brought to you by the National Federation of Associations.

Tonight, a special salute here on their way to Texas and to Texas history. Our first great moment. The Lone Ranger becomes a solo act. Hurry up, honey. Breakfast is getting cold. Where's my mess? At the cleaners. Oh, darn it. I'll have to use a potato sack again. I hate that. Pete, what is this, a brand? Oh, brand. Cashmere. Silver. But we can't tell Paul he's running late. He'll meet you by the mesa. And remember, we're having company tonight. The preacher and his wife are coming over at seven seven. But but honey were hot on the trail of the Big Butte gang that held up the bank in Golden Gulch last week. I don't care. Be here. I'm sick. I keep dinner warm for you. I'm tired of always having to adjust my life to fit yours. Sweetheart, if we have to chase robbers out across the open plains and we get pinned down in a snake infested canyon or something, I may not be home until nine or ten.

It's hard to know. Make up your mind, mister. I've got a life too. If you're not home at 7:00, then don't expect to find me here. I got to run. Don't forget your silver bullet. Oh, thanks. Honest. You forget your six shooter if it wasn't in a holster. OK, you see bandanna six shooter hat. And don't forget what I said. Seven o'clock. All right. Bye, honey. Come on, Silver. Oh. Oh boy. She's so dramatic. She's so dramatic sometimes. How can I promise to be home at seven. I can't get home and I can. That's all there is to it. I'll just have to explain it to her tonight. When I get home. She'll understand when I get up. Silver, come on. We'll be back with our second moment in Turkey's history right after this. From the National Federation of Associations, getting together to serve the common good is what associations do, like the Texas Association for the Prevention of Long Term Memory Loss. That, oh, the Alamo.

What about it? The Alamo. OK, the Alamo. The Alamo. Just another way that associations work together for all of us. So now back to work and our next great moment in Texas history, the invention of the Bowie knife. You shopping for a knife, sir? Yeah, I need a knife. I can hit people over the head with and maybe stab them, too. And we got some cheese knives here. I don't think so. How about a serrated bread knife? No, no. When it comes to stabbing, a lot of people like this long kitchen knife. Hmm. Maybe if I attach a ball and hammer to the handle, you got some grip tape. This might work. Mind if I try it? Oh, no, go ahead. But just in case, let me get your card in first. OK, the name's Buie. Expiration date is three forty seven. Hi. Thanks. OK. Oh I don't know.

Maybe I'll look around some more. There were great moments in Texas history brought to life here on the radio sponsored by the National Federation of Association. Yeah. Brought to you by the Federation of Associations, including the National Mesquite Grilling Association. All right. Where were you the night of the 12th Mesquite. Huh? Huh, huh? Maybe doesn't refresh your memory. Now, back to third with our last great moment in Texas history, the first singing cowboy. Quiet night left here. Look at all those stars and the moon hanging up there is big in the rainy Friday, almost makes you want to sing to fly by and do make you want to see your home. I don't know, Smokey. I tell you, I don't sound quite right out here, you know? Yeah. What about this lefty?

No, it was the one that I play in. La la la la la la la la la la. No, no. Wait a minute. I think I've got it. Oh, Monori. Where the deer in Antelope Valley. I know you mean this is it. This is our home. We got to live here out on the desert. That's terrible. Nobody ever said the music was going to make you feel better left lefty. I feel awful. Try that. I tell you. And again, I'm not gonna know her. She left and come on here she was upstairs. Yes. There were great moments in Texas history brought to you by the National Federation of Associations, including the Alliance of Gourmet Cowboy Cookery, the National Charles Wagan Association. Now, there was a memorable line in that script, I just want to point it out, you know,

that nobody said music was ever going to make you feel better, but it's just about to right now, because we're going to bring up here a wonderful, wonderful group, Robin Macy here on the guitar and Laurie Lynch down there on bass and the Irwin sisters, Marty on the fiddle and Emily down there on the banjo. Please welcome the Dixie Chicks. I grew up with Burwell's and Dadri my toes a little bit, but the point I was the farthest I've known by

chasing rainbows to the place of a. And that is something that I think Erin made a bit of. They may get a vote at. You're anything at an hour of only your. Shirley Temple Colonel Mike Evans will sing a song like Cowboy I Love. And I'm proud of the thing, and I've always made it clear that so.

We can't afford it either. You're everything I want to be your. Thank you,

coming out on the plane down near Santa Fe. I'm at a cowboy. Riding the range one day, he just didn't know I heard him singing the most peculiar cowgirl. So it was the day he learned in the city. Kermit, I hate Kermit. I believe I. I love it here. He's getting no better be on your way. Get a load, get little buddy, he dropped the moon down that old fairway thing in his golf cart, looking in the strangest way, no tiger diabetes thing. And his cowboy song, he's just too much. He's got to knock that Western accent with the Dixie Chicks.

He went, well, don't go away. He's what you call a swing in every thing. And his Jackass movie in the strangest way come a tiger diabetes. Nothing in his cowboy songs. He's just too much he's got to knock down with an accent with the Dixie Chicks. He went. He's what you call a swing and every thing and his OK, I look in the strangest way sometimes

I. I get now, get his little dog is you better be on your way. Get along. Yeah, definitely dropped down that old fairway thing and his car walking in the same way that. I believe that I. The that they're good.

We haven't heard that tone down like that. They'll be back on the second half of the show. More, I guarantee you. I feel coming to you from the Bronco Bowl down here in Dallas, Dallas, Texas, come in here and do a little bit of radio drama now with our regular lonesome radio theater feature. The lonesome radio theater brought to you by Guy's shoes, guys, shoes, try out a pair walking them, see what they're like. And now the Lonesome Radio Theater presents the story of Lyle the Wild Man, the time now, the place, way up north. I was born in a town called Deerfield, Wisconsin, which is east of Heyward's way up on the loosely W. Foster Memorial Forest, where my dad, Ernest, was a lumber. Studied. You almost got her there.

He's ready to pull Ernest again. It was a big, strong guy who did the work of really any minute. No, I think I know you're working on here. One more out to do it here. There she goes, Himmat. My dad didn't sell trees or use them for lumber, firewood. We had a gas furnace at home, I guess my dad just got a kick out of seeing tall trees fall. There's a good man over there, Jama'a. She's a vegan, all right? He's a vegan. Yes, sir. Actually, my dad made his living by operating a couple of hundred vending machines that were strung out all through the Lusi Foster Memorial Forest. It was a wilderness area and dare to go out in the chopper and land in the clearing beside each vending machine. He'd take his big gunnysack with him and then empty out the dimes and the neck of these vending machines.

And the wood sold maps of the Lucy Foster Memorial Forest. And they also sold candy bars was a very dense wilderness area. And we got a lot of lost hunters coming through there. So business was good, but many of them were desperate and they didn't have correct change. So Dad had to install bulletproof vending machines. Oh. And now look at that poor guy tried to shoot the lock off. Well, he's out there somewhere. You don't think we ought to look for him now? It'll be dark soon. And I got to cut down some trees there. These are these are the wrong maps in this vending machine. These aren't Wisconsin. They're maps of Texas. Oh, well, I can use them to start fires with come on in the tropics. The reason my dad had permission to keep those vending machines out in the Lucy W. Foster Memorial Forest. Was that Lucy W. Foster? You see, she she was my mother. She was so lovely and wonderful.

Even now, if I close my eyes, I can see her leaning over me. You beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful child. She was so sweet and kind and good and pure and perfect in every way. And, you know, mother is as good as that. They don't last very long. She got real sick just from some little things. She ate anchovies or something, and she lay uncomplaining on the sofa. Remember me? Always little. I'll remember how much your mother loved you. And in five minutes she was gone. I was desolate. I walked through the forest that was named for her calling her name. Mom, Mom, Mom, come back. Don't make me feel sorry for whatever I did, but my dad took it pretty well. Don't look back. That's my motto. What's done is done. Go live for today.

Now I want you to meet your new mom, Laverne. We were married last night. Laverne, come in here. Hello, Lyle. Hi. Hi. Is that all you can say to your new mothers? Hi. Give me a kiss. I kissed her and her cheek was cold as ice. Good. Now, you and I are going to get along real well, Lyle, as soon as you understand that we have a few rules around here. No mess, no noise. Now, here's the cup of gruel for your lunch. You go on earnings and cut trees will be fine, won't we, Lyle? Yeah, I guess so. Oh, that's good. OK, bye then. See you in a week or so. Bye then. You're a lot smaller than I thought you'd be, Lyle. You're just a pipsqueak. I'm eight years old. Well, here's a shovel. Start digging. Digging where? Out there by the back door. We're adding a room. A cellar. It'll be your bedroom. I always knew this was going to happen to be a wicked stepmother. If you think this is wicked, Lyle, you ought to see me when I get upset.

So I dug the little cellar and I put some boards over it and I slept in it every night. It was about six feet deep and not very wide. And I was scared and I couldn't sleep. I could hear Laverne's snoring inside under her big feather bed, but I was so cold I shivered under my thin blanket. And then I slipped up above me, my beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful child. Oh, how perfectly good you are. How handsome, how smart. How funny. Really me funny. Yes. You look like a little unhappy read in that hole. The moon is shining. Look at the wind. Oh the tall trees stood in ghostly pale shadows, a faint mist in the air and the moonlight so bright. I walked out into the forest named for my beautiful mother, deeper and deeper into the silence, stately

woods. And then I heard a sound and I turned. And there was a big wolf standing and staring at me with his big blue eyes. He motioned with his head for me to follow him. So I did. And we walked about a mile to a rocky den and there were five more one. They gathered around me talking and laughing. They led me into the cage and laid down and I lay down in the middle of them and they licked my face and hair here would be my home for the next 10 years. And this would be my family, my dad and my mom and my sister and my my old uncle forever.

That was so good to me. That was so kind of. It was the language problem was terrible, I mean, both grammar is very complicated and they only have about 300 words in their vocabulary, but each word has hundreds of different meanings, depending on exactly how it's set. And so the phrase that one can mean it can either mean the place where the deer come at night to browse or it can mean the way the sky looks when winter is approaching. Or it can mean are we going to have squirrel for the fourth night in a row? Or it can mean I really don't care for his work at all. It's so derivative and verb tense, the tense of verbs in wolf language as indicated by the angle of your tail, which in my case I did not have. And so I was limited to the present tense, but that was OK and we ate pretty well. Once you get used to very rare meat, it's OK.

And once a month when the moon was full, we'd all stay out all night and we just how our. But then one day when I turned 18, my dad took me aside for a little wolf to Wolf talk. I love you too, Dad, but I know I'm different, but but I've adjusted to that every day. Well, sure, I have an accent, but I but I feel accepted here for the most part. You know, I realize that it's held me back in hunting, but I'm differently abled. That's all I. All right. OK, but but discrimination against non wolves is something I want to fight

through. You know, I disagree. I think, Wolf, society is changing. It's that it's just a matter of time down. I just can't believe you'd ever say that to me. You really mean it, don't you? I have to leave it there. There, isn't it? We couldn't file a lawsuit. There's a lawsuit. All right. Bye, Dad. Goodbye, sister. Oh, good bye, uncle. Good bye, Mom. I walked over the hill and through the trees feeling that all of this had happened to me before somewhere, not knowing what had happened now, not even knowing how to think about the future, because I didn't have a tale to indicate future.

And then and the clearing, I saw a man. He had a gun.