OutCasting; Bullying and teen suicide prevention

this is interesting the lower hudson valley is on the youth radio show dealing with lgbt q chimes and struggles we don't have to be cleared to be here and our casting is a production of the beauty of age death and ninety point three boston and new york and on the night of the beauty of age the community public radio for new york's lower hudson river valley hi i'm maggie initial broadcast of today's edition about casting his own spirit which was first observed on october twenty two thousand ten in response to a rash of suicides by young people who were or were perceived to be lgbt on today's show chavez will talk with dan savage the nationally syndicated columnist author activist and co founder the it gets better project but first nor talks with becky that george and pissed off about the issue of suicide on a personal level i know a dreamy artist of george and that shiva i did that he knows it we're discussing the issue of suicide among teens who are or are perceived to be lgbt kids so bound for each of

us of what goes through your mind when you hear that it's happened yet again i'd just like to get it really upsets me those ideas don't like it when people die or first know express my condolences to you know any family has lost their sons and daughters are any loved ones due to that really makes you also feel kind of you know hopeful that you know programs like beer gets better project and such really maker does have support for these things it really frustrates me and perplexes me how people can still be so ignorant and her full towards of the people went so many other lives that haven't taken an unpublicized then summy events like there are more there repeal don't ask don't tell are publicize as well and people are just still so ignorant to make people take their own lives it's just frustrating yeah i mean i definitely feel that especially just

just reading about it were just seen the article pop up and it hits big hits you like a train makes it makes me feel like like i'd like i had done something wrong person i wasn't and i wasn't there even though even though it's not necessarily something that i could have you know affect that had an effect and that it's it's still a son who care so deeply about this community and who want so badly to make people feel safe especially concerning their sexual orientation and gender identity that i've i should have failed and it's in a way to calm so just one us and ask about ahmed has anyone hear it been bullied or harassed especially in school year out can do up with jerry's not necessarily the story but the aftermath like those threats afterwards i was just completely upset let alone crying in my mom like ronnie melt my guidance counsellor and i was quite

surprised was like the next day the us call down to the principal's office and they said ok so what happened i made a statement and these guys got suspended expand how has it gotten better for us as the community the lgbt q youth and i'm straight allies armed so basically newark state there's something called dignity for students act that will be in effect in two dozen twelve and basically what it does is it states that there's zero tolerance when a student in a new york public school is harassed for being for it perceived to be lgbt arm and that's something that is going to become a serious legislation a new york state prison i know that you've spent sometime sort of lobbying for acts like this oh could you expand on that sense yes about a year ago i went to washington dc with cliffs and which is the gay lesbian straight education network and i lobbied for this safe schools improvement act and this did non discrimination act

both address the issues with the administration and schools and eliminating the obligation the teachers feel and really making them liable and telling them that here's what needs you need to step in and intervene when these occur when these events occur is normally teachers just assume that they don't need to intervene and get confused but what was what i was really excited about was that new york state was already onboard and for me the lobbying process was a much easier cause i knew i had the support of mir state however for many of the other states it was very difficult for them to get these acts supported and they had seats that were not is accepting and is welcoming and i was difficult to hear and i think that's something else that we're going to talk about is i'm out what can we do

as teens to help make things better on especially in the school environment and so in terms of my experience why i'm local president of mice my school's gsa and what we do is actually mostly straight allies so are basically what our job is is to make ahmed issues visible to the greater school communities so we make a point of making posters making information of they'll ball tossed it's about when she visits me because at least in my school they're definitely gay students and lgbt q individuals but they are necessarily open or open to the entire community about their sexual orientation or not that they should be by the fact that we don't have a home people walk out with like a rainbow flags saying look at me i'm gay or lesbians and so forth we make a point of a sort of showing we say okay i disagree that this week is ali weekend well it means is that we're gonna be

celebrating the people who help and who support the lgbt community in the school and we really did try our best to put it out there and to make sure that people know about it but unfortunately i had this phrase my kids will be kids and a lot of art displays often torn down and sort of the face and the best reaction to that is just put up more because by doing that you're saying we don't know that we don't care that people aren't being passive aggressive about this issue but the fact that we're gonna we're gonna fight you doing that even if you're silent and you're being a coward about basically being a big it or just showing a lack of respect for her fellow students another thing that i don't that we won a sweeping up is when they're coming out early or what eat when you're in high school whether that's always a good idea and i know chris hasn't quite a compelling story to share those

i think it's really critical for at each individual lgbt on number or person to really think about and consider when your time is to come out on for me i was so i continue to be an eagle scout and as a boy scout it was really challenging coming to the realization that i was gay because the voice gets is not support above the members an atheist and so as a result i had a fear that i was can be kicked out and as a child one of my dreams is to become an eagle scout and it was in elementary school when i first started realizing that i was gay and throughout middle school through at the end of middle school was when i said come into people and especially my mother and one of the first things i told her was not to tell the people in boy scouts and for me i've had a very accepting life all of my friends all of my family ever never encounter has been incredibly accepting

any of the fear that i've had is i've been kicked out oh boy scouts ice when ago about again and sort of talk about umm what are it as a dozen radio show what are you get better message is for you i would just say that the amish ration is a powerful and awesome foursome use it you're very good advantage george orwell the message i think that may all just a small price of the tickets better campaign had is that to tell teens they're gay lesbian you know anyone ever they're such and then he is is that you know if you're feeling suicidal person that their lives are just as a poll just as important as any other human being that there are they're not less than anyone they are equal to everybody else a nation feel other and that they are because they're gay or anything except that things at a less than human

they feel it's really important for each individual to consider at that everyone's unique and that everyone has their own time in which is comfortable for them to come out when it's safe for them to come out and you shouldn't feel obligated just because you're in high school or just because you're a college the need to look at your life and to think about what can happen to you and how things can affect you and really wait until you're comfortable with it and you know that is to save time for you at least for me i am i want people to know that regardless of how you're feeling and i mean if you're in a very dark place that there is at least if not more than one person out there who really cares about you really wants it to get better for you and that if you're able to identify the person and you make an effort to understand that a person cares that deeply about you is that you really ought to reach out to them so that they can help and help you help

yourself and essentially get to get you into a better place because i feel that having that that aid they're whether it's an adult a teacher of violence can take your parent or a friend or someone your own age is that they want to help you and they i'm positive that they'll do anything in their power to make sure that you are safe and that you are an environment i'm abby and you're listening to a casting in the lower hudson valley from the youth and radio show dealing with lgbt q chances shovels we don't have to be creative here at passing is a fraction of the beauty of it than ninety when perry asa in iraq and on the neck of the beauty of age the art community public radio for new york's lower hudson river there was a rash of highly public

suicides around the autumn of two thousand and ten by young people who were or perceived to be lgbt billy lucas corey barker asher brown and telecom and dee were among them that fall our guest dan savage in his partner terry miller established the it gets better project which is a whole campaign for lgbt youth we're recording this interview for national broadcast on spirit day october twenty spirit day now held annually as a day to wear purple as a sign of support for lesbian gay bisexual and transgender youth and to speak out against bullying spirit they were started in two thousand and ten as a response to the suicides of these and other young people in addition to co founding the it gets better project band savages also a nationally syndicated columnist and the author of four books ben thanks so much for joining us might it then tell us briefly about the beginning of the it gets better project barbie gets better project in response to the suicide believe that goes on in the project was actually going for asher brown

walsh pretty parker committed suicide or september of last year ground on people came to the project a yarn in your heart why do you think it takes these terrible heartbreaking events for a shift happen and meeting culture for things like this to be recognized you know is it a religious organizations politicians parents have about the us believe that being gay lesbian bar trans is a choice in that he made as an adult children

when a little boy every week those who say the thing to wake the country up to the existence of gay children two are looking to the burden being placed on you know we as lgbt issues that are much more hotly debated on queer people you know you know mom and dad were growing up you know bringing up their kids to mega church lawn mower second only your greensburg indiana originally abuse you know gay lesbian five terms before the ballot box as a distraction for no two of the bar turns adults can help the blood their children go to school with square children there will be queer children

in greensburg indiana and if you do you just in a culture where the older children are going to school with a crick we're hearing every day that lgbt people are a threat to their families and that'll be the key people are trying to destroy the country and you destroy the family and even some republicans unreasonably destroy the world you're in a peer pressure that you know the sort of bullying and violence because of the ballot box and the removal of the ballot box wobbling and violences being visited on lgbt kids oh no and then i think those concerns are local country up to that fact that children are paying the price when adults wanted to be to adopt lgbt children are playing and the prices were twenty or anti queer hate campaign waged by the religious right at a recent press article about our program about casting for a comment from a reader who wrote that there is no gay suicide epidemic and he said that's a

media driven allusion and he was pointing out that people don't fill out surveys before killing themselves so there's only speculation about reasons what isn't about this world right now apple went out and ate at every side of the bullying but he hadn't heard of an ok reason behind it sam bashor wealth from one of the victims of people talk about you know that awful september of last year when you look at you know he donna part may not have been given out of a contemporary people in our lgbt and we know from studies won't get very emotional maury that fifty percent of all the end of the polling that goes on in middle schools and high schools this entire lgbt people and this is not just bad for lgbt kids that are all at the suicide rate among paterson took an entire schools were anti lgbt boleyn it's allowed to run on sect and the sexual

assaults of girls in schools were entitled to the people in his world to run rampant in higher than in schools dr entitled to be a political battle i know ms behringer had an affair that you know there are songs that temperature there haven't been a spike in suicides has been a spike in awareness about suicides among lgbt q and a spike in one of the only in the fifties in the schools and that were going along through particularly that we you know you can argue that overthrew third rate of conflict being over because of the ontario you going during the gemini it now this fall we mourn the suicide of jamie rhome ire of forging real team from buffalo new york and he had contributed it gets better viewing titled it gets

better i promise you what you think was going on with jamie won't be watching at home or you know whatever argued that it would and beutler and suicide or doing is throwing a lifeline and kayaking people to resources often all about how they can make what they can do the changes to a short but when you watch january myers it gets better video you can clearly see now in a word money well how do you know you know holding on what health and if you watch on and off and hope that in

the future is to both we're talking with activists nationally syndicated columnist and author dan savage turn up testing we don't have to be cruel to be here i didn't but despite some of these tragedies in the tragedy of jamie what effects do think it gets better has brought about what we know and her lawyer good morning but we've heard from parents with her companions you can go into the videos on youtube and you can see lgbt teenagers reaching out leaving comments talking to the creator of your videos and getting advice insight support that they need to get through what for many of us were people are the hardest few years of our lives and we've heard from the other parent

and the parent of teenagers so what we hear from parents backing off of the videos letting us know that campaign has really made a huge difference in the lives of their children who we know are whether they're good or not or sexual is non conforming a little different these kids were really you know miserable you know we heard from a moment georgia's said that she has been using with her kid who's been bullied for being different like the other boys who may or may not be gay but she'd been thinking for years it would get better i think it's better that you're over and she just said that you know it never really reached an area for your neck and so many lgbt adults who live there really reached him and she could be that open verdict and a former warden and you know

prostitutes we went from one video for your fifty thousand videos now been viewed more than fifty million times the goal wasn't to have more videos at youtube channel that anybody else ever the goal is to save lives and we know we saved lives we've heard from people we've heard about situations and circumstances including her video creator interacting with somebody was watching video online and then calm the paramedics and sending them to the person because he was hard to tell who is not just good kids have been dissuaded from arming themselves real world interventions have taken place and besides making an it gets better project video of what else can people do to be supported and support of inspiring tolerance you know there's nothing about the project that excuses are really clue to do more we need to do more we'd outfit schools legislation we need to can a policeman to hold schools accountable only to make sure that you're gay straight alliance in every

school could literally lives aren't static and also jean he can grow more police amount of getting the militias harassment that events there like your general motors oh yeah we need to investigate it's criminal and they're going to the principal going to school vouchers in an island off thinking ok to be done it once there's a shopping mall he gets arrested and prosecuted for assault new york if it were six your kids have grown

purging your kids don't like sisters in schools and audiences parents a new trial of a criminal complaint and felt like an assault ego traditional like foursquare a boy were you know boy just been born do you feel like we're approaching a time or gender identity and sexual orientation are not issues her yeah we are so the hawk is we appear randomly drop it would be wonderful way to wheat weekend we formed strong communities talk about we're always going to be interlopers were always going to be

refugees to certain quota will reach a point where economics you i think we're reaching a point where people have a problem with it are two people who are regarded of the problem that lgbt kids aren't the problem anymore a problem and parents who don't love and support their children for the people that they are very the problem is the problem and got a huge change in a positive light grab it than three routes and prevent rejection was homophobia rest of society it is how it responds thank you what do you feel like is the next step for teams who feel like it has gotten better for them well i think that you would be

recruits and they get better project was a lot of the gold talking ticket you know and old lgbt people talking about their lives and share insider well with lgbt teenagers and lgbt teenagers who feel about of the modern cars and to contribute to the project jamaica videos appear videos and a lot of the maryland have a lot of them from the very outset of the word think of a video work you do think republicans will talk about how he would get into college just got his ged went straight to college think that you know the video's seventeen years old school age and talking to other high schoolers were being bullied and laying out the real option for them they can get them out of a toxic or a positive way about your ged and continue their education at a different college environment bill who they'll make a video

for you you know you they will advocate for uva fuel you comes down like ten pounds crop on a school a school public school that blocks the formation of the gsa because it is illegal to block the coalition and they take that very seriously and the aclu is a mere sideshow if you're in a position where you can stand and try to make a change in your school note you are about your nipple world to forget about you know i would go interview and that we need to call on the cavalry were hear it then is there anything else you an ad no problem and given the war still to be cute country where they need to be heard will thank you so much for all the good work that you've done that a person wanna thank you for the start of the project in the hope that started we've been talking with dan savage you're an outcast and we don't have to be true

to be here you can find more information about the it gets better project or watching the thousands of videos on the it gets better project website it gets better dot org thank you so much for joining us dan you've been listening to our testing the lower hudson valley is only youth and radio show dealing with lgbt q chimes and shovels if you're having trouble whether it's at home school or just with yourself call the chamber hotline at eight six six forty eight a seven three eight six the trevor project is an organization dedicated to lgbt youth suicide prevention call them if you have a problem being different isn't a reason to hate or hurt yourself again the number is eight six six forty eight seven three eight seconds passing is a production of deputy and eight fm ninety point three

awesome in new york and on the net at w d s h the art community public radio for new york's lower hudson river valley for more information on this program analysts of resources including the char part of suicide hotline number visit wgbh dot org and click contact us and i think you very much for joining us and tune in again next time it's been