Vietnam: A Television History; Trung Sisters Temple [Part 2 of 3]

This is a prayer for the Unitarians. Written by me an old fundamentalist Episcopalian. I hear about the overburden hearings Mirpur pleads be they don't want to ask too much. Miracles and sun which just whisper in the air plead to be the one eyed Daher like other foods which do all the water find cure a hole saw. I'm not on my knees asking for world peace or that the polar icecap freeze and say we've the polar bear. Or even not the poor be ferreted or angels hover over my bed. But I would sure be Piers if I should have been an

eighty years. Oh sure to leave existing order will. Move. I'm a radio American for 35 years doing an all variety show based on some I used to hear when I was your age long who grew critics pointed out my debts to Bob and Roy in favor of the gear. But alcoholism and cigarettes swept those critics out to sea and to 20 year olds who were born too late to hear the great Fred Allen. I am the inventor of the form. Sailing in the air waves like Magellan. Oh thief who escapes and is not home and may yet be

altered. But there ya go or war war war war war war who I've been writing sonnets lately and that's what these awe war will because I'm an English major and if I don't write sonnets then who'll well or. The buil t of the sonnet is to teach us that sometimes as though we think we have a great deal to are sorry 14 lines of Ah our big pentameter is in Najaf. Whoa whoa whoa move move to Margaret was the smartest girl in the eleventh grade. Tall with drugged hair tied up in a tight French braid. She was the only girl I knew who read über

coom and for that very reason I did too. I stood behind her in choir a lonely baritone but when I smile hold her exotic French cologne and felt they are exist stanch ill he'd turn of her body became Luciano Pavarotti's in Kuai was where we met and the mysterious mugger the woman whom Ali would do or would. Is the choir sang praises to the lowered to the back of Margaret's head. Many many thing that could never be such a doodle war there's a nice acoustic in

here war or will person could get used to this move here by the enormous swimming pool of the hotel Biltmore are 26 young dark skinned women lost in tiny bikini's like mermaids on the shore and dog bone for is it good. Just say alone looking for you Penelope to tell the tale how that whole Trojan War just gave me the willies. The pointlessness of it so are those sets. Having paid off holders and left to kill the judge in his turn around and cause of favorable wear. And came to the Biltmore to re compute

my route and found 26 young dark skinned women their breasts display Id like fresh rule of thumb but no thing. They all only wanted you my dear lover stories sure to be over. PEPE. Can or a will and the good of a here or at at first church. And thank you so much for coming and thank you for bringing your camera with you it's. A great courtesy. I'm not really going to talk about my book a Christmas blizzard because it's too short.

And if I were to get into it then. It would just it would just take his forever. It's a complicated book and and it's in it's a little bit beyond me I wrote the book but I have not read it yet and they are. All I'll say about it is that we had a blizzard in Minnesota this last weekend and our our children were pleading with us for a snow day and or failing that that we should give them a ride to school chauffeur them to school as if they were the children of wealthy Hollywood actors and. And we said no we're not going to deny you the experience of walking to school through heavy snow and blinding and snow blowing sideways. We would be remiss as parents

if we denied you a little bit or a little bit of hardship in your in your childhood this is what stories are about. And we know this every year at Christmas because we all strive to achieve a of a perfection of Christmas and of decor and of food and to find the perfect gift for each and every person regardless of whether our feelings for them are perfect or not. And and yet we know perfectly well that that the most memorable and beloved Christmases are those when something has gone seriously wrong. And these are the ones that you remember and cherish over the years. I once spent the holidays in troublous Norway which is above the Arctic Circle. You go up there in in hopes of seeing the northern lights this is what draws you. You believe that you're

going to see sort of green and yellow and orange and red lights dancing on the horizon Well you're not going to. You're going to be in a in a in a in a small dim place where the sun comes up around 11 in the morning and you never see it because it's all cloudy and overcast and rain is pouring down. And it sat somewhere around 2:30 and the food is just wretched It's just horrible. It's mostly codfish and and ever so often you're treated to lutefisk. Which is which is a sort of a gelatinous dish which reminds some people of congealed Flambe. I had the flu when I was there in Tromso. And so that offer sharpened the experience for me. I went there with my wife and brother and sister and their wives and then a couple of friends

and I and we walked around in the rain and we and we ice fish for a while and it was and it was just the worst vacation you ever run and and it and it and it really brought us together in an amazing way and we've we've talked about it ever since. And and every year I feel fresh gratitude that that I am in America and I'm not in Tromso Norway. This. This is a nuff. All you need to have a good time. Well here I am in in Ralph's church and I should I should say something to the ghost of Ralph. I suppose he must have preached here probably stood up here I doubt that they had this carpeting when he was here. In the 1830s and 40s. Ralph was a great man he was a great citizen of Concord and he did a lot for

him. Henry David Thoreau who might have been pretty hopeless otherwise. And he was probably the first American to make a living riding around this country and giving lectures and and doing a kind of stand up in his case he had a lectern but he was he was he was good the antecedent of a whole race of of lectures and high minded talkers in America he was the one who paved the way for them. He did leave us with a lot of disastrous ideas. And and we should not let him off easily just because he's been dead all these years. When he said that. To be great is to be misunderstood. He he opened the door for a lot of. Really difficult people. To imagine that they were geniuses. A lot of

people who were just disagreeable and hard to get along with it took from him the idea that they had really had something. And he said that nothing great is accomplished without enthusiasm which unable to a lot of terrifically enthusiastic people who were mostly enthusiastic about themselves. To to to go out and and imagine that they should bestow themselves more generously on the on the world and all sorts of people who might've been wonderful carpenters or or wonderful parking lot attendants. Were encouraged to become lousy writers. And and and do badly in other professions. He did say that that every hero becomes a bore at last and I assume he was talking about himself. And.

And this is something that is. That is. That's worth remembering but all of his all of his or all of his urgings of people to to go your own way and follow your own drummer. And I don't follow the path. Make your own path and leave a trail. Encouraged all the wrong people to go do all the wrong things and we should hold him responsible for this. He believed in individual ism. I don't really. I come from the Midwest and. We've seen what individual ism leads to. I believe in. I believe in groups of like minded people gathering under one beautiful roof. And so I think as long as we're here in this gorgeous place we should sing a song. This was a this meeting house was a was a headquarters for

fervent abolitionists back in Emerson's day. And I thought we could try singing a song that you don't know but you soon will. It's an old African-American spiritual from for first traced back to the 1830s and and where it comes from. Nobody's quite sure but it's called my father. How lonely it's a very repetitive song and and be really beautiful if you if you sang this you might want to just lift your heads a little just lift your head a little bit. So that your sound mingles up here under this under this great roof and it's approximately in this key right. We just make a chord here we'll be off on the number got more money saved is how easy it is.

You base is the love there you go what. Was there. Oh no. Fall over. Whoa whoa whoa low. This poor shit or so for you. And dude wold be. Oh all here war rolled be moved. Is it wold be that this poor was shit in so for he try that much for the ha

ha ha ha ha. All that is poor in here. So he ended war would be a low. Here it war will be a little room. And good wool Walt. Beat this poor she in for here if any of you Unitarians don't like the word center you can sing the word person rule.

We will was the reward. Where was the really rude. We will walk the dog reward tour though I'll do just a rule so good war will be the law. Hear it. Whoa. He. Did warn the hayloft. This poor sin. So for a beautiful we need for more bases. We will all be we.

Be weird or be. The. We were all or hear creek where the Lord will there be all of us who've. Dared war will. Be. The law here war will be the law. Dear war here in. This poor city enter heave. We will all be there as was weary law

be as was. We will law. As was here in the new movie Jack. Who said of them. Did you warm. Be we low low beam me low. Low. Big data was. Theirs. Who were her sort of song from the 1830s. When this church was a church was erected not sure they're saying it here but.

It would have loved it if they had known it. Well I was in New York. All this last week. We did our show there from the town hall and I like to hang out in New York where people like myself are in a definite minority. And and in fact everybody is in a minority. You know in New York City I'm not sure there's anybody already that if that exists there anymore it's a place which is on like on the town I grew up in in that people do express themselves in New York. And even even to people whom they do not know. And and this and this happens all the time. I was walking to the Town Hall to do my show on my way of the host of a national radio show was

walking along in my black tuxedo and. And. I want to step off the curb and in front of an enormous gray SUV. And walked around the front of it which so. Irritated him that he rolled down his window and he yelled at me and he yelled the name of a of a of a of a common bodily orifice and. Which each of us has I hope we have. And. And and. I. I didn't understand what the what the what the problem was he said use the sidewalk. Well I pointed out to him. That his B he mus was was straddling was off work the sidewalk and and and so I had

walked out in front of his car and he said. What's wrong with the waiting. Well the Forty third street there between Sixth and Seventh was. Packed with cars it's all jammed and I waiting for the light to turn down at the end of the block so I was hardly keeping him from the swift completion of his appointed rounds. But I didn't see any reason to point this out to him. I just wished him a Merry Christmas. Which really tech to mom his. Dad was the salt in the won't. And and he told me to go molest myself. For it. Somehow I found this. I found this cheering in a way realize that the people have the freedom of speech.

And in New York I did not grow up with the freedom of speech. Maybe our house was kept to call wall or something but I just I never. I still don't feel the the right to say exactly what I think when you're in New York you're among You're among people who do. And I was I was walking up Central Park West and a woman in a long black coat and and black boots came came walking towards me and and she said. You have done terrible terrible things and I am tired of it and I don't ever want to have anything to do with you again. And I hope you understand that. And then I saw the cell phone which was in her hand for it. But she could have been talking to me. Me or it could have applied to me I

felt I felt as if I'd gotten off easy that me. And she should have made a general announcement all of the men who cheat was she who she came across that they did this sort of free floating anger is is is one of the lovely features of of of New York City. But Christmas comes along and one of the beauties of Christmas depending no matter how you how you how you view Christmas or how you what you do with it. Is is that it does it does tend to spread some sort of some sort of light heartedness. To it to tamp down the anger that is that is ever around as always is in the world people who have not received their due. People who have not received what they feel is coming to them. And people who have been thwarted and have been frustrated and

drivers of enormous vehicles who have pedestrians walking in front of them. Feel feel and he knew I was an enormous anger the verges on violence. And Christmas comes along this peaceful time. I realize that this is a joyful time which is depressing to many many people. And this is a time when when painful memories are are dredged up and when people feel inadequate and when people feel the pain of old of old family troubles and arguments and a strange woman spied. Still there is a light heartedness about Christmas which is simple. At the very heart of it and which says all of the right thing is that God came to earth in human form amongst the very poorest of the

poor and was first worshipped by. Rough. People on a dark night in and a little two horse town and Judea and. That out of all of this comes comes the spirit of charity and the spirit of love and forbearance that we all that we all count on. It's a beautiful holiday back where I come from the you Norma's Douglas for stands on main street in front of the statue of the unknown Norwegian. And. In Lake Woebegone in front of the sun's a canoe temple where the lutefisk Dinner is served every every. Every Christmas when we eat the food of poverty and food that our ancestors were forced to eat when they came over from Norway after the great herring famine of the 1870s. Forced to eat dried cotton which tasted of soap.

All of the shops are there in the scope of those five and dime in the side tracked where people who couldn't medicate themselves for. It. For reasons that will will never ever comprehend. Life is not long enough to understand all that goes on on the street and and the dissonance between the Catholics of Our Lady of Perpetual responsibility and on the Lutherans in their modest church people who use modesty and and deference as a weapon. Against. Against others a dark a dark self-effacing people with with with much to a face. These are the people that I. These are the people I come from people who were married in the church and after their marriage ceremony and after the dinner the couple stayed behind to help clean up.

This is a whole other breed of people. People who are people who play joyful music very very quietly people who under wraps their Christmas gifts very carefully and fold up the paper so that they can save it and throw it away in June and July. Those are the people I. Those are the people I come from. Well I had this. Beautiful experience I mean of trumps who was a great experience then this was then this was even even better I had this experience back in back in. On Labor Day Labor Day Monday which time I'm on is an experience that opens your eyes to. A great deal around you I knew I had the Cerebro vascular incident. When you're in the atrium and one of your Atria shoots propulsive

Lee a blood clot up up above and it goes up into your brain where the subject to mood is stored. And. And also it's a words that you don't use so much but you're planning to someday. Words like propitious and. And indefatigable. And it up where you keep low snatches of songs and little bits of. Poetry $0.5 we weep to see you haste away so soon and love is not love which alters when it alteration finds Arbenz with a remover to remove you keep all this stuff up here in your in your head and this blood clot than it is is capable of of tremendous damage. I was over in Minneapolis when this occurred. I was at my massage therapist Angelica's who I go to because she doesn't play that flute music.

And. I was saying something very funny to her after she told me how happy she had been since she gave her life to the Lord and. She was doing my glutes at the time and. This just seemed to me to be so interesting. And I was about to say something then it all came out of my mouth sort of slurred as if I'd had a big dose of novacaine and. She asked if something was wrong and I said as I've been brought up to say I'm just fine. And out the door I went and got into my car and I felt sort of off balance and and my head was sort of expanding. You look like the sort of mystical experience but one that you wouldn't actually want to have. And I drove very carefully 15 miles over to the hospital and parked in the no parking and.

And walked into the E.R. and the waiting room and here was a long line of people with very little petty complaints. Skin irritations and you know muscle tenseness and and what not headaches. Who knows. And. But I took my place in line because I was brought up to stand in line. And I was brought up to be deferential. We use this to demonstrate moral superiority and. And I was behind a woman who had a moan that she wanted somebody to look at. I looked at it I didn't see. Anything. That interesting about it but. She had this my wall and it was on her mind that she was on her neck. And then I walked up and I said pretty clearly I said I have

had a stroke. And and the woman with the mone said Oh my God oh I'm so sick. You should've. You should have said something. She said Oh my God she just terribly flustered which was the reaction I was looking for. And good. And so they piled me on a gurney and took me back into this little curtain alcove and a very nice young Chinese woman took down my wrote down my admission form I could see what she was writing on this clipboard she was she was writing very nice 67 year old man awake alert. Appropriate. Thank you for. The I'M. A lifetime go all for me and. Appropriateness and it was.

And then she wrote showing flat af act. Which was what I was brought up to do I mean I mean even this is the Midwest we can sort of modest you know we didn't know we were supposed to make a big show of ourselves and they take you up and put you through the MRI machine which is sort of the source of Flash Gordon. Cyclotron and you and you go in there for 45 minutes away in banking and as they as they take pictures of your of your skull as it turned out. The blood clot had. Had hit a part of my brain where not a lot was going on. In the yard. Which which I may have more of than most people. In. What way what way what we call them. The North Dakota of the brain.

Well I suppose it's for reserve capacity. But when this happens to you. And then when you when you walk up and down the hall attached to your ivy tower and with your little electrodes on and and wearing your two flowery cotton hospital gowns one for and one after. And you walk along the halls of the stroke ward and you look. Through into the rooms which you shouldn't do of course but you do anyway. And you see all of these old people your age who are. In their collapsed and who are going to have to they're going to have to go back to the fourth grade again. And go through all of that again. Then you feel this new lease on OnLive. You don't feel scared. You should have felt

scared. Two hours ago. But you but you didn't know enough to be scared. You don't you don't feel scared you feel enormously lucky and enormously blessed and then you think maybe you want to try to turn your life toward some purpose you know and accomplish something and do something worthwhile other than just mess around it. It's getting late in the day for that. When you're even though you're a very nice 67 year old man and. And you are and you are appropriate. We depend on these on these interventions these days enormous strokes of good luck. I first was aware of this when I was your age I just graduated from the University of Minnesota.

And there was a war going on back in the late 1960s and. I was in Iraq. I was in a bad situation. First was an English major and I had nowhere to go with that. The the price the people were willing to pay for sonnets was very low. And I was engaged to be married to a young woman whom I was starting to figure out. I was not in love with. I was in love with her cousin. And I was going to marry her as a way of getting into the family through another door. I've gotten a number of letters from my draft board and the most recent one ordered me to report for induction to the U.S. Army a specific day and time having already passed the physical. I

sat down and I wrote them a long letter single spaced both pages both two sides of one page about why I didn't approve of this war and what was so I would not go. Sort of a sort of heroic and deeply dumb thing to do. But they haven't asked for me to. Talk about this. And. But I volunteered this and I mailed it off. And so I figured that I. It had nothing to lose. I was. Either going to marry somebody I didn't love. Or go to prison or both. And so I should i should take a flyer on something that I really wanted. I've been reading The New Yorker magazine since I was a child and. And so I got into my 1956 Ford two door sedan and I drove to New York. Before there was an interstate

system. You had to take a long time to get around Chicago and and get through Indiana and Ohio had some super highways and then you caught the Pennsylvania Turnpike a beautiful old road and took you to New Jersey and then you made your way towards the bright lights I came in the Lincoln Tunnel and I hung a right and I and I found a parking space. On West 19th Street and so I looked around and found it. A boarding house there you paid $75 a week for a room and board breakfast and dinner. I signed up for three weeks and. And then discovered that this double brownstone on one thousand street across from the theological seminary. Was in fact a halfway house for people recently released from mental hospitals.

Who were heavily sedated on thorazine and who spent most of the day sitting around in a day room and exercising their jaws and waiting for dinner to be served. Not the worst group of people to be around actually. They they told a lot of stories some of which might have been in some remote way true. A woman named Marion Tanner worked in the kitchen who when she found out I was in New York to try to be a writer told me that that Patrick Dennis was her nephew who had written Auntie Mame and that all of this was about her. I didn't see the similarity but. But there was one in her mind. It was a beautiful place to be in this in this hustling Hispanic neighborhood Chelsea now kind of you know upper right rising genteel neighborhood

and but full of machine gun Cuban Spanish and and all sorts of odd people. I was dressed as an English major sort of as I am tonight. Jeans in a white shirt I had a corduroy sport coat with leather elbow patches. And and I wore dark glasses. I had a beard and hair down over my ears I wore a white Panama hat and I was writing taking notes on on legal paper with a with a ballpoint pen. I was hoping to write something about New York that would convince the New Yorker to hire me. I've been writing for them for years they just weren't aware of and. And so I thought that this would be this would be the thing. There was a young woman there who seemed fairly normal and who was there was just because she was from Des Moines Iowa and

she was tall and broad shouldered and really a handsome woman. Mahogany hair tied back you know in a clip and. And she seemed very stylish to me especially for somebody from I was and. Well and. You probably only been there lately. I'm talking about 40 years ago. She was there too to try to get a place in the American theater you know. And she she wanted to be an an actor. We we we went for walks late at night and after after dinner and the dinner was usually the food that made both of us a little restless and. They served Tom pretty regularly. And coming from the Midwest we were not used to eating meat with little bumps on it. And. So so we took long long walks around Manhattan and

we talked and we talked. She sang to me her audition piece which was from The Music Man. There were bells on the Hill but I never heard them ringing Till There Was You. And she sang this to me I could tell that she came from a very loving and supportive family one that could not bring itself to tell her that and she had no talent whatsoever. Couldn't carry a tune in a paper size. But she was lovely. And I talked to her about my hometown back in Minnesota. And she was she was the one who gave me the the free advice that. Why why oh why are you writing about New York. Why are you taking notes on street people. Why New Yorkers know all about New York already.

And you're wanting to write about people that they go out of their way to avoid. Why don't you write about back where you come from. Which is the great lesson that every writer needs to needs to learn. If you come from Minnesota then this is your first subject your first subject is your own family and your parents and the people you come from. The people I come from were dark people. They were people who believe that suffering is what we have in life this is the meaning of life. Don't expect it to be easy if it is easy. Be patient this will pass. And we had winter to to to bear this this. This lesson in us. But there were loving people. And all you need is just a few you know to sustain

you when you are a kid. When I was in my mid teens I was about 6 feet 6 feet 1 weighed about 138 pounds. Wore hand-me-down clothes high water pants wrist sticking out of my cuffs. I had home cut hair you know with a high shaved arc up over the ears which tells everybody that you can't afford to go to a barber. Kind of a mark of shame where I come from. Least in my mind it was I wore clothes some of them handed down from my older brother some from my older sister. A shirt with decorative elements on them. On the top and with darts on the side. Hard to explain to other boys the M jeans that zipped

up the side of. The. So that you had him you had to carry your books in a strategic way. When you walked around. But I had a beautiful end to Auntie Eva who lived by herself in an old farmhouse that was falling down she kept chickens and a couple of geese and a couple of cows and had a big vegetable garden out back and canned for herself she was of a fireplug of a woman and built like a brick shed and and she had no children she never married all they would say about her when I asked was that she was not quite right in the head. But she was a loving person. When you went out to stay with her you were set out there thinking that this would make you appreciate the things you had at home such as running water and electricity.

Neither of which she had. But what it made you appreciate was something you've been looking for that was more important to you which was which was the love of other people. Our government are. Tough people who did not praise or encourage their children for fear that they would corrupt us forever. And she was swooping I am one who had come down on you were both arms around you and tell you that she loved you and she cared about you and that you were somebody and you were going to be somebody. I suppose she was sort of like our Ralph Waldo Emerson. She she she she believed in taking your own taking your own path and she believed in and those he has and don't be a $10 haircut on a 59 cent head. Was one of her size. She went around and I'm in a in a in a cotton print dress that a lot like

the kind I wore in the hospital and. And. Which smelled of life soap she she she wore her stockings rolled down around her ankles and a pair of sneakers for comfort. And she she was a beautiful soul. She was a close person to me. She was odd. She had her eccentricities. She liked to wear white sweatshirts on which she had written things in an ballpoint pen and later Magic Magic Marker. She wrote these old sayings that I that I never that I never could could could could figure out if if ifs and ands were pots and pans there'd be no trade for tinkerers. We were islands in the sea of life and seldom to our periphery lose touch if wishes were horses than beggars would ride. And the world be drowned in a sea of pride.

She could hypnotize chickens she had all sorts of gifts. She loved to play starlight moonlight. She had so many beautiful qualities and she was a loving dear person even if she was not quite right in the head. When I said goodbye to her after I had come back from New York and was. Getting set to go back out there. She gave me a sweatshirt of my own on which she had written. Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds. It is an ever fix and mark that looks on Tempest's and is never shaken. It is the start of every wandering Bard whose Heights unknown although his depth be taken. She loved words she adored words and she loved to say we should sing another song you know.

We should sing so you did so well on land. Let's make a song about angels here in this. Gorgeous place. They're all around us. We're talking about angels here talking about my my in can tell you my just sick of. The mind. And I could think of other stories about angels. But see you soon hear. The much of what's funny we have to find a key here first you have to find the right key and then the words you know come to you. There are a gels of rings around. The raw range of Hovey ruling. They're all really gels. Heyy they ensure those rainy run.

Good to read the top I danged hole to look at I read that I need a hole to cry. Re re the me who the new movie Jim Rood saw. Who the new movie Joe Rue saw. Who the new movie Love and do you. See. She does bids us call. And she's BIG just.

As she does. Gee we. Need some of those pieces. Beautiful look at all the children. Close the lid at all those children. Oh oh oh oh lead Oh oh room oh. Oh oh oh oh oh. He and Jim those watching who over the loo. Hold the Oswald. Hey Joe's watching over me.

Even though here in Cambridge a judge is watching be. A judge oh right. Avery Jews are watching over me. Cor was all whole day. Oswald I can be just as wrong. The new oh do the heat enjoy. Watching me get even and he in Harvard Square. Hey Jay keep me

too. Angel was hovering in there we angel was watching me be you. And then the pain as you're watching over me. And he really was she a change in his walk. She told me or was. Oh oh she was was she you know me though. Oh oh. He was. No never

be you all whoa whoa whoa. What happened to your letter from the director of the draft board. I would like to know. And. And I've waited too long to try to find out. I I mean I waited for years for the FBI to knock on the door and and nobody ever did. Nothing ever ever happened. Here's the work of another angel and I would like to know who this who this angel was. My guess is that somebody who knew my family. Worked. At the draft board and simply. Took my file and stuck it. Where the moon doesn't shine. But I don't know. I don't notice. And you know and I would love to. I would love to find out.

For those of us who aspire to be storytellers in the oral tradition I have a very private question is that your son. The it is there any part of your creative process that you would care to share with us. Well yes of course of course which which part are you interested in was the O.O. maybe something about before you tell a story have you thought through maybe themes or characters or ideas or poems or does it. Does the muse just speak to you flawlessly. But. Well do you want to the truth now or do you organize. I do want the truth. You do want the truth. Yes I do. OK all right. I don't like the word storytelling. I don't like it at all. And because storytelling it seems to me is his writing that's what it is. It starts out as

writing. And people who launch into a long story who have not tried to write it down. At some point back in the past Stephen. Usually people try to leave the room. At some at some point. We're writers as who is who we are. And. And but for someone who says who stands up and tells a story writing serves another purpose. It's not to finish the story. It is you start to put it down on paper so as to. Exhaust. All of the wrong. Roads and go down on all of the false trails and bring yourself out to a point where you won't go

down any but where you can go find some other path and then you're ready to tell your story. Any any any. Anything that's written down is unfinished nothing is ever finished you see. And and I think any writer would tell you that. Books are sealed up. For commercial reasons because they're supposed to be sold. And so they have to be put into a package. But every story that's ever been written. Was not finished. And the author would have loved to have finished it. Shakespeare was not done with Hamlet. I'm sure that if he'd had the chance he might have gone back and it could've come out a different way. He didn't have to die.

Could he could he could we could work that out some other way. You could've married Ophelia. And. And and and something and something didn't have to be that rotten in the state of Denmark. So so that's that's my advice to you is that you you sit down and you write it's a way of thinking. You don't know what you don't know what's happened to you unless you write it down. And so that's why anybody keeps a journal or even writes letters to other people. We don't know our own experiences until we put it into words and the best way to put it into words is to put it down on paper. But that's only the start. That's only the start. The other thing that I would pass on to you is that. All of the interesting stories are about. Failure. Humiliation. And doing terrible things to people.

There are many great stories about acts of righteousness. So get started. A few years ago my wife bought me a book which when I sort of yours was called a liar I am a Democrat which I thought was great particularly the middle three or four chapters which I took and that's where I would suggest perhaps it could be reissued as a memoir of the 60s. You're entering the University of Michigan one thousand nine hundred from a family that hasn't been to the university and you know everyone you met in particular resonated with me. I entered the University of Michigan from a similar family at the same time I was a Stevenson supporter you were a Humphrey supporter we both as I recollect moved toward Kennedy. It was those three or four chapters were great on the time civil rights and the good 60s and and I think would have a terrific

and wide audience with a title other than why I am the Democrat on the. Which I can see was necessary in 2004 as I was telling the young men no there are not that many really wonderful stories written about righteousness. Well it's a memoir. You said that when the draft when I was on what happened with the woman that you didn't love but you love your cousin and then you went to New York and I imagine she didn't take it too well that you like just one they just were in New York says one of what happened there was what happened while I really like her mother was a logical fear Yeah yeah I really like her mother in law her mother was really wonderful her mother really liked me. And and so it was it was like an arranged marriage in a way and so I married her I married her and and. And you know we had a child together.

So you know it was not without purpose or meaning. And. And what the outcome was I'm still trying to figure it out. Well OK let's say it's just it's a story I should I should tell this story sometime it's an interesting. It's an interesting story. And it and it sort of tied in with the West with the draft board you say. Because I knew people who were draft resisters. But I thought but I was not a draft resister. I was a draft evader. And. And so they they felt bad superior to people like me. And I'm sure that in a sense they were. But when I meet them now and I see what a terrible price they paid for having gone to prison. I feel as if my cowardice. Had had a purpose and a meaning to it. I've

I've always done well with cowardice. And so often if I look back on my I'm on my life. I'm still trying to figure this out. I wrote my draft board a letter saying that I wouldn't go. I don't know that I actually would not have gone. I mean who knows until you know they come for you. But I wrote them this letter and I sent them this letter and that made it possible for them to let me off. So that my my I didn't have the moral purity you know that that that one might wish except looking back. I don't wish for it. I'm confusing you know. There was. No. I mean yes a little. We have. The IT. Well I'm confused about it myself. And beyond I guess I was kind of like what your other question of the other guy sorry. Because I was in a short.

I yeah I was wondering about narrative structure and how when you tell stories that have kind of like a very similar background and are subversive to root for you how you avoid falling to the same trappings with stories and telling the stories kind of the same way the same general story over and over again because I've listened your show it's been off for a long time. Most of my life and I've really appreciated it and I feel like there's a freshness every time. So I was wondering how you were able to achieve that. It all comes down to the prodigal son. I mean it's just that's your basic story and then you know there are few others but beyond. I'm someone to someone of great privilege throws it all away and goes off to a foreign country and wastes his substance on riotous living and comes back home in abject humiliation and and his contract and is received beautifully by his father and the fatted calf was killed and the older

brother who had been good all those years is just you know obviously ticked off about it. That's your story. And you can change you know you can change the characters on it and why. But that's YOUR but that's your base that's it that's a great story. And but but but it has it has that narrative structure and you would never change that narrative structure. Every year never change an outer section. It will show you wouldn't you wouldn't have the fatted calf killed first on the and. What if the draft board would take. One of the draft board were. What if the draft board would take you unless she changed her section. I can't change the narrative structure and that's that that is that is the story. And and I would just hope to drag it out through appeals I guess. You're a writer I can tell you have this an.

Yeah look about you and you and your argumentative and I like time and they're troublemakers and I just got to the finals that's really all it is. How they go. I took computer science I was a mistake. You're right but you can always correct it. Fiction fiction that's what you want fiction. With. It was. A fantastic I was walking home from class and came upon this and I'm just overjoyed to be here. What class were you. I was at spirituality as an interesting factor from Leslie University. Oh sure of course. And actually that kind of ties into Of into my question statement. And then just constantly amazed at how universal your speaking is when you come from a Lutheran background. And I'm just I'm just a little Jewish girl and I love this show and I find that most of my friends that do love the show are also Jewish and they can't quite understand

why why we feel like you relate so much but it's just so much about the human experience and it's just we hope from you people. It is still our guy came from you. Can. Tell that story. So that's where we are so that's where we get it. Yeah I suppose. So where were you brought up. I was brought up in Jupiter Florida. In Florida in Jupiter Florida butterfly. We couldn't be more online. And. It's true it's true and have you ever been north for the winter. Well I've lived here for five years. This is north for me. The end. Of Summer. You did OK. So it's going well. Absolutely love it here. It's fantastic. Good good. We wouldn't use the term fantastic. We would screw it so it could be worse you can't that was OK.

I wish you well and if you notice if you do. I feel like I'm holding confession was. The first thing I want to say was thank you for a Prairie Home Companion you made growing up in the Midwest a lot more interesting than I remember the good ones. Were for you from the Midwest from down no annoying OK. A Masters spinner of an anthology of Africa. So I was curious do you worry about the atrophy of rural America and maybe that we're losing some of these Lake Woebegone settlers and some of these stories some of the backgrounds that feed end. You can see storyteller you don't like it. Writers such as yourself do you mean you think that we're losing something in America as you become more of an ivory was in the places for us to get out of the cities. We believe we are losing them but we've been losing them for one hundred fifty years. So this is a long this is a long process. The Midwest has

been and exporter of people of its young people for a long time. We spend a great deal of energy and devotion on educating our young. And then we we send them off to benefit the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. And I suppose I suppose this seems unfair in a way to us and we. And we miss them but we but we wish. The best for our children. And. And so we would not deny them their their their freedom this is always been a mobile country it was settled by mobile people. Yes this is a little tell that works better. Well I can tell that you like I really love 19th century and songs. Another of my favorite ones are the really moribund ones you know my brother is dying beside me or I lie wailing on my mother's moldering

grave and you know all that kind of stuff. I think it's a lot of fun and I was wondering if you could sing for us whatever your favorite really Hori terrible morbid old 19th century song. Mom friends have you heard how a long talk with two little children whose names I don't know who were introduced and left in the room heard people say. And one and it was not so sharp was there applause at the moon and the moon. No. They saw it and they clearly crowed and the poor little thing.

We're not sure this is a song that was sung to be by my aunt and I was. She put me to she put me to sleep at night seriously. So I never heard the third verse I was always asleep. So you know I mean that when one shows the kids died then I fell asleep you say. And so that's all I remember of that one. There's something about robins so red brought strawberry leaves and over them spread but but I never heard that I was asleep. I was asleep by that time. Well I thank you that that's a good one and whenever whenever children or animals or mothers die that makes a good song. Absolutely I'm with you. Morbidity morbidity. Rates. We're going to be with. You. As you're. A good many years ago on your

show you can get an updated version of Little boxes on the hillside. Maybe maybe you don't remember it. I've been wishing to hear it ever since. You must be thinking of some other show me in. Another life that I never liked that song. The Melvina Randall song I never I never cared for. You know you and I you and I differ on this. Well it was to me it was a kind of a snobby song. And it was looking down it was looking down on people who live in modest houses and she thought that she was attacking conformity. But to me she was a talking to low income people. And I don't think that's in good form. Way. Than it would be knowing how many doctors and lawyers

I know but those and that's not who lives in in little boxes made of ticky tacky little boxes made of ticky tacky were worse subdivisions suburban subdivisions of them of the late 40s and early 50s like Levittown and and hundreds of others and that's who she was making fun of. She was a San Francisco person. And they kind of have a bad attitude to start out with. I mean they feel superior to the rest of the country and then she knew that she needed to feel superior to people in San Jose. I guess I was mistaken. And no no I'm not saying you're mistaken. We just have a different feeling about it which is we disagree and you and I are old enough to be able to express our disagreements frankly. Were. It was a no no apology no apology and whatever show you were listening to. I'm sure it was a terrific show.

It's Bush. This is blame yell from the Harvard-Yale game. I've been listening to your show since I was like really young you still are. I know. But. It's kind of funny because like my family's Lutheran which makes me the only Mexican Lutheran I've ever known. Like ever. But I want to ask you real quick my mom and like if you could say Merry Christmas to her I could get like so many daughter points. Like if you like me so like I'm going to call her right now. Thank you. Merry Christmas to you. And Phillies now. Mary Pierce her through Murray Christmas New

Years. I guess I. Was. Right. OK. My mom sent me this and also to you. OK. Who's you gentleman whom you know. Well. Sure. Oh you. Good how are you. Just fine thank you. I also grew up listening to your show I would want to visit Lake Woebegone as a kid and still do. But my question actually I recently picked up a copy of. Good poems for hard times and introduction you talk about the lack or the loss of communal life in America and a sense of commonality and shared purpose which I guess is it's

probably. A difficult thing to have. And to begin with in a country that's so diverse as ours. And but. I guess my question is recently I feel like a lot of people my generation thought that we had. Kind of regained that in a way with political changes in this country in the past year but I feel like now we're as fractured as ever and. And. Maybe even worse off in some ways and I wonder if. You think that there's if there's a way to regain some feeling of shared purpose and shared. Mission and and commonality and or whether that's kind of a. Impossible Dream. We have to pursue our own new and watchful eye from people. People your range you have full of full of optimism and we and we look to you for. For for optimism and certainly don't look to people my age far think. They know too much they've seen they've seen too much and and they've had the wrong experiences.

No people pay people your age or have have bounding enthusiasm. And your generation I think is a generation that is that is more literate than mine because of the Internet too and and has my highly developed social skills and I think has an ambition to see them see the world and to and to live life big but we have to live it as individuals. First I think before we have anything to offer to each other and now there's those there's great possibilities for for common lives. Don't be discouraged by by this last year and I you know we don't we don't we don't measure these things in months or more years they take place over a long well over a long period of time and we have we have much to hope for and that's a really nice looking shirt. Or am I. Thank you target for about $5 So there you are seeing

a $5 sure going to look that good on you. Make that the start of something big. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. All right. The mother yes sure yes. And there my question is also I guess based out of a political question and as you said to the fellow earlier fiction is what you want. And you know it's because we understand that fiction has power but my concern is that some people are realizing that fiction has power who we might prefer not have realized it that. The people are realizing that fiction can be used towards dare I say it pernicious Athens or. People get it in their head that those who disagree with them are using fiction towards pernicious at once. And I was wondering

whether what what your thoughts were about this sort of trend in our society. At this point we trust the reader. We trust the reader if you don't trust the reader. And then and then what's our hope. We we we we trust the reader. And I do I think the reader can and can read dishonesty. And quickly you know in in a few pages and some people prefer dishonesty but nonetheless I think people can if you can read this very clearly and and pernicious in this whatever you whatever you mean by that people people pick up on it instantly. The readers are are. Smart. They're bright as pennies and. And we count on that. We count on it. And I toss our lesser works aside and they don't and they don't waste their time on them. And and they're in there.

They have good taste. Well you see if I didn't if I didn't think that I wouldn't be here. You see you have some optimism still. Yes well sometimes I. Am. I'm one. Letter. Hi Mr. Kaylor First of all I like to say here when my favorite authors and I listen your show ever since I was a kid. My name is Dan sorry. And so I just wanted to know if Lake Wobegon were a real place. All the stories you've ever written and really happened. These are real people. What would you want to live there yourself. Like is that your idea of a utopia. Well now we're assuming it's a fictitious place and. That's OK. It's actually in Myst County and it's been left off the maps and it's invisible to satellites but would you want to live there anyway real or not. Well some days some days I would like to live in Lake Wobegon and sometimes when I'm dissatisfied with myself which which which

happens which happens often when when I'm when I take a hard and and charitable look at myself. And my own personal character. And and. How I spend my time. Then I think maybe I would be better if I lived in Lake Wobegon where there are fewer options. And where you are always being watched by other people. It is in a way a kind of a Lutheran penal colony was. And so your life is always open to the inspection of others. But on the other days. Which now are most most days are not like that. No I wouldn't and you couldn't pay me to live there. Was I would I would I want to live in a place where I

can see movies and I want to go to shows and I want to hang out with people who are entirely unlike me. You know who are Jewish and who are from Jupiter Florida. The and. Those I met. I'm not I mean this is not an odd. Thing is it to to want to be among people who are entirely unlike yourself with the you know the word diversity I'm not sure what everybody means by it but is this what we want. Well sure I guess it makes life more interesting. Of course it does question doesn't it. And it pushes us a little bit. So no I would choose New York if I could choose any place. Fair enough fair enough. Great turn up OK. I think we should. I think we should close here and I think of it with the young man mentioned a communal experience. I think we should have a communal experience and I think that we should sing Silent Night. It's is in your hymnal. If you need love words.

Give it. I think it's around 2 to 250 wanted something but you don't need the word Steve. Let's just let's just find the key and let's sing Silent Night. I'm sorry. Who's what. I'll dim the lights dim the lights I thought you were saying give me more light. Which would be a whole other thing to talk about. OK let's just find it. And. Those. Words. Lol.

I was. So. Warm from. Her.

Oh shit hole Oh. Oh. Oh oh oh. Oh oh. A. Oh.

Oh. Her. Thank you so much thank you.