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from npr and barrett golding of hearing voices the best of public radio supported by the corporation for public broadcasting and the national endowment for the arts so one adult ok you have a job my own apartment but my mother still doesn't seem to realize that i'm capable of taking care of some really very basic needs it may have a tablet already let's pick out about a vehicle bureau that the way it very often be to a get in line you may want at your bladder or write have a small detail bye bye that's off the sea the eighties answering machine for more than a decade new york city comedian amy berg koski has been saving your mom's phone message i hope you're right away whoa i get the word that they had the big york headed back there for the fact that it would accumulate

have about the world like the outlying areas so if i wait you i would ever getting a lawyer is the weather that day so they go well peculiar bubble up that a rapper got correctly say they're protected because it out there were at that point there that report ok barbara you use dot com you're listening to all mom radio a collection of motherly stories from producers around the country we've got a lot of moms to visit and this next hour so let's get going the first few stops bingo night with beverly donofrio as mom and right now we're off with larry massett on his travels with mom my mom is close to ninety years old but he still likes to travel to accept think about traveling anyway when i'm going down to

savannah where a visit we often planted a trip took on the phone about driving to florida jacksonville maybe or sea world or even the keys yeah she says that would be found on the phone it sounds like your bags are packed but when i walk in her front door there's a different story though know suitcases inside just a styrofoam cooler that's the clue it means where we're really going is the local beach pie beyond half an hour away this is where we always got social welfare reform no i don't travel very well you don't have the energy waiting for your interest it's you getting what were you go more for comfort them know anything

else and it is the world stage current environment these days as a cottage in a retirement community what's behind trees and mockingbirds and air conditioners humming away and there were full of disinfectant and ian take a look in the kitchen thirteen novels that have some new cake before a meal for an id makes travelling if you look out the window and almost scene can't quite see the building with a button you can take years if you can set up mr lynch you can't see that from the news for the past two years

of must buy time has been spent and helping miami's take care of my sister she's had two strokes since recovered physically but mentally still has problems and i don't think it will have been the only thing i can do the purpose to reminisce when we were growing up and we've covered that over and over so and a lot of things up probably would still be doing except for months has just don't send that has changed my life more than anything drinks at

the end of that there's the problem of different message for a very thin veil people value of only fifty that's right my mom travels in a semi retired oldsmobile stuffed humans it would rather have a chopping or they can mention folks don't have it right now and replace every road

bridge and creeks in and let a lot of bridges lot of plans it is a few miles long the mile markers along the beach condos it's probably not but it's still most bongos and my mother's time people came here for the ocean air saturday nights they came to dance and they say they hit big name and some guy lombardo says we're headed first my mom wants me to turn off the main drag on to the sideline we wind up in a

place i don't know for a big old wooden buildings one after the other line like army barracks weren't for disgruntled where i worked in nineteen thirty five pelicans were spilling north given secretary in manassas where i was working when you're dead and i were married we had to get married her views going broke running down here from atlanta a few weeks ago when he was working for the forest service in atlanta and alice ward apartment here and a third term husband and wife were not allowed to work for the government so we were married to secretly in september because i wanted to continue my job for the rest of the year which

ended goodman needed the money they are worth imagine that my mom with a secret us what went on with no money mama page twenty one else's she forgot to mention phooey drive around hunting for the house you lived in when she were terrified nothing looks the same snow used for some to get up and drive to a house we can find the one we all lived in when i was four or five it's a beach cottage sep ten feet off the ground on pilings records pretty big today onthe enough it has shrunk to the size of the dog house a few tiny rooms where my mother and her sister lived with the husbands and relatives of kids bought some a porch runs around three sites

on board well the point is i work that women think she had a d and little more things and red lipstick and she laughed a lot and smoked cigarettes that misspelled hold more pronounced know and when she said i wonder if some freshman bring every man who works goes into them so i say it's time to get the okay finally we're getting out of the car downtown ideas surfboards motorcycle yurt and set every looks to be eighteen

years old and start making pacific for a flesh colored things that really in his test the fish near the front is built in a wide circle with a roof over this is where the advantage of actually people you know this is a new one and for some reason they put in the supreme court which country it's jammed tables and screaming kids in vending machines it doesn't feel like somewhere man sits down peacefully with our bottled water in your case since you just think people these flesh colored greens fishy filtering edition setting the clock back to nineteen forty five where she'd go oh yeah

listen this is something we never miss areas with a dancer see like dancing much more than it is un seated dance from the first glance until lately they'd sing it can be affected by hans gal a lot over one thousand new phone numbers given to a vendor and

dancing along the surface of the stragglers too many names you'd go waiting in the ocean which your beautiful evening this hour a very loving you had fallen in those days in the theaters were traveling right now here in nevada that's very close to my kleenex in time and memory when

the interstate police the station bingo and heard about it since i was nine or ten i remember distinctly sitting on the sofa and closing my eyes hard wishing wishing my mother would win some money when she actually one hundred dollars which to my mind was the same as ten thousand it would change our lives i was certain it actually good for maybe a week usually harried and i'm happy my mother was lighthearted she

sang to the radio she smiled so there's the internet that most american whom we my mother and i are in my hometown wallingford connecticut there are a lot of factories and car dealerships here and women about my mother's age over sixty who have a thing for bingo my mother plays three times a week night she lays at fifteen dollars for bingo cards so what you hear the saints played before so it's actually it wasn't my first time i played before once five years ago in a failed attempt to feel closer to my mother i'd expected to find a room full of warm chummy older ladies trading stories about their grandkids bingo is serious business and it's about money the women mostly x factory workers like my mother had sat hunched over tables and a

smoke choked room concentrating hardest arms flew across sports that stretched two feet in both directions when some poor woman yelled for the call you please repeat a number of being a playwright our table tell editor hearing you know i played a headache and one who really i mean these were grandmother's even my mother admits her being a police can be nasty battle but the majority of them this time the atmosphere is different the people seemed social room not nearly so credit or smoking the big money games the women who remain just because they like the company now there are around forty women seated in clusters

here in their lawn cafeteria tables on stage is an electronic bingo or the next to it is a box about sinking hong kong's upset at the path to power to protect the women have bags with ngos stansell <unk> order to cross them to carry their chips in plastic tupperware containers they like the electrodes one the edge of their time and bingo watch this my mother's knowledge this incredible she could predict the exact number in which a new movie called every time he's even read about a woman who has a tendency to accidentally called bingo when she doesn't really have that it happens in the very first game at old my mother near bingo partner vivian ho magnetic wand and their bags and sweep up their mobile chips issue latin

a few times my mother leaned across and places a chip on a number of missed it was a tie not so long ago when her son listlessness would have driven that i am i can sell it now it makes me feel that he was actually having fun it and even i didn't want and dilation and i groaned with everyone else when someone yelled bingo and all i could imagine that if i have to move away i might with my mother once a week i'd sit next to her arms touching like they were when i was little and would roll my eyes that every word out of my mother's mouth when i make fun of her dress and imitate her speech she turned to me and says one day we'll be best friends the way it's never happened but i'll tell you there's nothing like touching shoulders with someone who watched it when as much or more than she wants to win or sell except maybe touching shoulders with someone you feel the same

way about it you may not be my best friend she's close to the paint so our staff's crater beverly gadhafi us thursday night bingo produced by dave isay of sound portraits dot org and larry massett struggles with mom is partly hearing voices dot com radio project they get out the red curry well you wore when i get a bit like the boat will be read but the bell that would be good you know the

way it did that of comedian amy board koski cd amy's answering machine messages from our available at or websites and amy dot com yeah the way they get that on tv it had no way to get children are thinking god don't know why they did it or you might be in the big thing when you've done ok all right well ok craig michael owens political weapon particularly

i don't know woken up to your mom actually called me and want to know where your area you are they are really worried about you well in a way or the other a couple years ago baby baby baby next up again and goes home to help with his ailing mom and his homophobic family or back in a minute with more all mom radio from hearing voices dot

com do is supported by the corporation for public broadcasting a private corporation funded by the american people and the national endowment for the arts which leaves a great nation deserves npr this is hearing voices the regime from hearing voices dot com you're listening to all mom radio a collection of motherly stories from producers around the country with my mother anything that happens like even a distant cousin somehow has an immediate bearing on my health yeah they

i don't know if you heard that had the direct hit the good thing about paul that bring together a lot of which is why i'm going to take care of all that though feel like a giving birth it began to go toward that i'd like to add that we will be ok ok bye bye that's off comedian amy book house keys see the eighties answering machine messages from our available letter websites and amy dot com you are always debating whether it's harmful for kids to watch too much tv but i think the biggest problem is what happens when your parents watch too much tv thank you anyway

i think that shot of the guy from greenwich village with coveted had to the back of the crowd a frightful with a very pretty girl with a you know he had you are here we're weak you know i worry about it you want to go for it you know it did ok when it

the next piece is from this american life producer nancy updike she calls that mubarak and margie this story is like one of those russian dolls where there's always a smaller one inside the smallest are the core of the trauma is the fact that mubarak childhood sissy grow up to be a different kind of sissy and his father his father's nerdy and bookish of mark's gay everything around that core gets bigger and bigger until finally can't believe the biggest and the smallest have anything to do with each other the one is so bloated and the other so tiny at to begin you this story of arts parents are married and in love and both prepared to live far from everything they know to be with each other at the end of the story they may still be in love but they're divorced at an ocean apart and not speaking and mubarak is caring for his mother the way husband my arm for blacks are smarties shower and he's holding on to her

so she will fall and she's holding on to him to she's about five feet tall naked and fragile looking very pale and he's dressed in jeans and a shirt that he knows are about to give you well worth of education arguing that harvard statistician on their mission and you'll get over again as he gets a washcloth in under her breasts and she stands serenely winking in the water it's a moment so intimate it's hard to watch but then as he gets her out of the shower is drying off there's another moment that makes the intimacy of everything before it seemed completely beside the point pretty doubt in comparison he takes a baby wipe and wipes her about for her

mission to take some blog though a lot of that takes a lot of devastation but they have given your shovel to take england there's a different you have to catch martin's only sixty six but in the last couple of years she's had a heart attack and two small stroke which paralyzed her right arm and affected her memory it cuts in and out like faulty wiring sometimes his talkative and remembers a lot sometimes she's not and she doesn't mr bearss for maintenance so that we can make sure you have a rational people who still does begin to make sure it stays dry suit doesn't get a ration care what work is is closer than you were thirty get to an adult woman's life you have been katrina but this is the end of the story this is today let's go back to the beginning

the brice family didn't really notice that he was as he tells it the big sissy because they were all oddballs and matter where they were living at least one of them was always not quite fitting in march and george and lived most of her married life either up north or in the middle east mubarak's father sob are as palestinian born in jordan but for most of the marriage they all lived in a small town in pennsylvania where he was a professor of civil engineering now with mubarak was a sissy and white working class catholic hershey pa summer was to begin a week off of school every year because so many people so many boyce went hunting when deer hunting mom but of course you know i didn't go hunting and i didn't play any health or paul and i didn't do all of those things that you know the boys in the neighborhood were supposed to be especially hunting hunting was like you know at a yardstick and when you reached manhunt that

sabra meanwhile two of the shame and horror had to call a neighborhood dad's to do simple mechanical tasks like clogging a drain and margie was the one who hung their wedding pictures because summer claimed he didn't i had a hammer a nail no summer didn't do any of that stuff i mean summer was always very formal he always had a sport jacket i i remember mom like cutting grass was a big deal out there like lawn care like how green and how even how perfect which are guard and i remember suburbs in the yard cutting the collapse and he was kind of progress against bork vote and its high a lot which is funny i mean if you think about when and why we do it and i think that came from the middle east idea that if you are educated but there's a certain position that you have in society

and that you should always look and act a certain way you can see why in this atmosphere some are one point panicked and made margie son mubarak up from little league to toughen him up he told her but mostly my she says cyber worship mubarak he adored him mubarak is seeming portrait that mubarak that they're in everything he talked about was mubarak thought she found embark as they produce a thing when they hardly need to newsman marty was the one who made the phone call to mubarak after finding a bunch of gay dealt cards in this room he was twenty years old and staying with friends in germany at the time on his way to a semester in england and it was it was the middle of the night i don't remember if we were exactly in bed and the mother came down and said in german to my friend there's a phone call from america and it's an emergency for your american friends

so i was all nervous and i went upstairs and it was marty and she was crying she was hysterical as she said as margie what's wrong and said you have to come home now and a supply what's wrong and she just kept repeating you have to come home now and i kept trying to get out of are what was once such a finely said we found a good hospital in tennessee that can cure you and then i knew what was wrong that of course i told her that i was coming home until the end of the semester and i would see her in january and i can get hung up right away this was the beginning of their world starting to shift and become something else some acclaimed margie for mubarak being gay summer who never raised his voice before the pound the table and say mubarak was gay because he's a mama's boy i didn't think i made the same person that

i used to be jamming and a chicken some no no no no because you didn't meet me he was in such bad shape that he had taken off time from the university i think he took a whole semester off from teaching at the university he was so bad at one point he would say it ends like stare into space and not respond to the conversation to questions and they had like home healthcare like an iv for him at home because he wouldn't he came home around christmas the asset down at the kitchen table for a family meeting margie didn't say hardly anything the whole time and neither did i actually somber did most of talking and he

said basically he started with the murder of sun and we love you but this is wrong and this is an illness and there are doctors you know whites looked into it and their doctors who say that if you just try to get help that you can change tj you know we say the word homosexual oh god no he would never say that he would say your condition or your problem or your situation you would never say the word gay homosexual ever ever ever like even in the years after that he never ever sang for the biggest problem with mubarak being gay was that he would never have children he would never have a son to carry on the family name this summer had done this summer's father had done this was mubarak's obligation after a long argument a lasting somerset to mubarak was this i remember he said he looked at me and he said i will sell all the land in

palestine to raise the money to send you to a doctor if you ever decide that you would go and that's it they and if you're being palestinian in understanding how important land is mainland his identity it's a future it's the past it's everything and for sabra to say that he would sell all of his land showed that this was really the top priority in his whole life for two years nothing changed the bark stayed in school and kept being gay summer stayed depressed and roebuck long letter saying he loved mubarak but mubarak was sick he owed it to somebody get help margie quietly began flying barak scott mailbox with condoms mr jim sabra move back to the middle east as it always planned to do and somber tired he was sixty five

she was fifty nine six months later everything shifted again the family mutated again becoming more like what it would soon be unless i could have been before it started with another phone call to mubarak well i mean the way i first found out about it was i got a telephone call one afternoon from margie after she said how many do you think i could come live with you and i was and animal which was talking about ice of margie what are you talking about she said do you think i could come live with you and then she told me that she and somber were getting divorced because he was going to marry another woman and have another sign effective force wasn't even with summer wanted at first he asked marge if she would be his

partner and what he called joy they want to shoot ahead make france a young lady thank you can get lonely mr wat and he said i want to marry another woman and have a baby i said okay soccer knew better friend won you think you can get along with her i am not going to hear and then the you know she went to the powers' plan a in the plan b was having another wife of a different apartment and then plan c was him getting married in the west bank just going down there a couple weeks the gear and then basically living with margie and jordan her response to that was always my favorite that's when she asked him she said okay that's fine as long as i can have more than one someone you tell as me what happened overnight paid sign then

you've been done mind you in prison he and i remember somber wrote me a very very long letter explaining what he was doing and why he was doing it and how he had been forced into doing this because for years he had been asking me to go get help but i was just ignoring him and he i felt that it was his first since i was not going to have a son to carry on the family name that the responsibility of making sure that the family family named survived suddenly became his again and this was the only way he could sing to do it and he was very heavy on the this is your fault you're doing this to margie not me the other thing that was really strange was he spent pages saying you know tried to kill your mother is being very closed minded about all of this

try to convey try to help me convince her to stay here she doesn't have to leave i don't want her to leave says other divorced margie telling her every day until she left that he loved her and didn't want her to leave and she got on the plane and began the life she's pretty much living now from that point on instead of a husband she would have a son and from the moment the plane touched down he treated her the way you'd want her husband to treat you diplomat a man now playing you know we get through customs in moments the costs of his gray a big bunch of flowers some it was held in a way at the neck indica you accountable and i said somebody's is certainly don't get them say a bearded folk ok if i was invasive that was any guesses margie moved into mubarak's graduate school

apartment which by the way was at the same university were somber had taught in her own life she been supported by one man her husband the professor and her new life she was surrounded by whole sissy entourage parts friends were always coming in and whisking her away to the orchestra to play as they adored her she still cried every day many times a day for the first few months and every day she got at least one letter from summer sometimes too finally one day later they came from somerset he got married the black not knowing what is in the letter gave it to marty and went to his room and came back out i mean it was five or ten minutes later and she was still sitting there that she had a funny look on her face so i said are you ok and she started saying things like please send her weekly some hurt me and crying like margie would you

talk about them coming closer to coming closer to her prey and she she didn't know why what's she you know she wants her amnesia the bar cars at a vacation from that bad news last several days or enlarge is cardiologists office and she's about to surprise me on the last day i spend with marching barak she suddenly murmurs that he wishes where bart had gotten married mag latch and most mothers who say oh i wish my gay son got married and you ask them who they don't say i'm a stickler remarks say you know western part of married and a girl and i'm sitting mark stone to perceive as a nice

cat and he can have them in power even after all the time i've spent with her i had completely expected her to say a woman's name because even though it's common women tires day for the mothers to be more accepting and the fathers they usually at least some pretty clear limits for the mothers to certain ways that they're used to seeing the world and just can't give up the marchers were the mubarak's are not really separate as they are for most gay people and their parents vargas retired she's here he says it all the time he spends a lot of time with margie willingly happily he's the only person i know who seems as an ambivalent and his love for his mother as she is in her love for him every once awhile he talks about something i know he thinks about a lot which is that this is the end of march is life and he's grateful that she spending it here if you

really want to clean margie margie margie technique what is at work what's happening while i was taping my jihad would seem to be a small stroke margie margie margie it all happened in about two minutes and when it was over margie seemed fine although disoriented and high and she couldn't really remember when it happened we were more shaken and she was mubarak and i talked in the kitchen afterwards while he made my juice and tea physically see a cell or a dissonance is scaring me go to the hospital and says the first amendment and she had congestive heart failure you and you don't know what that means either your heart countering

the panic and then i remembered the other two times but going into the hospital and thinking should be easier this time every time to happen to get scarier because you think you're one step closer to something really awful acting and the last minute really serious it's been nice but yes it may not be clear from the story but i think largely really love somewhere i think he really loved her

we saw it clear as day in the pages of her wearing scrapbook she chose to a picture from her wedding day suburbs embracing margie and both their eyes are closed their smiling they were completely happy probably not even aware the pictures being taken very thinking with them over there was happening and they're known in the us when the phantom and you know it well i thought it was the rabbit moon charon there to resent the never did says the bark and margie from this american life producer nancy updike from hearing voices dot com you're listening to all mom radio motherly tales from around the country

i was watching the maury povich show the whole show what the bailout eligible billionaire bachelor and one of them in particular i thought what a perfect way to be here you get the point so i called her back and told her absolutely do not call the maury povich show and two hours later i get another message hello renee i called the maury povich show and what would be required is that a bachelor of video and they'll know i'm a lot like you that

you're preparing to ship or a day at the big board they are going to go by the apa yelling so i call unintelligible cooperate i don't know this and i know this guy can always my time making the stupid video and the next day i know i know it through me to prepare for the bachelor know i did i got a picture of you in a bit about what you would do we get the day you can't make a call at about that that he liked the fact that you were white pride in the picture for a graduation way it's not the whole lot bigger there that you like to play in all right

bye bye a tough comedian amy broadcast dec the eighties answering machine messages from our so my mother lives out of tehran and see who use any excuse to finagle her way into coming for a little visit i it made me i did want to have you know i think i'm good in here in new york and i was thinking maybe at home alone like for a few months maybe i think that that two aren't there they ever knew that the public away and read their love the only light there have been here i had a lot of i don't know like a highly paid they're making good ally at home to issue well we'll be back to hearing about it

all mom radio was produced by hearing voices dot com with grants from the corporation for public broadcasting and the national endowment for the arts thanks to the contributing producers nancy updike from this american life this life dot org larry massett story editor for hearing voices dot com producer david isay and writer beverly do not frail from sound portraits dot org and the cd and book of amy's answering machine messages from mom are available at our web site send amy dot com basically my mother has no life ok if i am her entire life and even a total stranger can pick up on that yeah hello ma you remember that we live on the wild with the light like a well i call the one gallery a reading and he would have a little bottle of the

things he can ride one at that point if i had a letter that all that like either a day already and you were you romantically involved with a very very narrow legal maybe going for people are ready to pay no way the hearing voices dot com website is stuffed with more sounds and resources also check transom dot org a workshop and showcased for public radio hearing voices music so by skyward and by rocket ship and barrett golding son imam yeah i know i

should call more i will really i promise i will love you bye hearing voices are supported by the corporation for public broadcasting's a private corporation funded by the american people and the national endowment for the arts which believes a great nation deserves our producers oh scott carrier ann heppermann larry massett and carol aren't any snacks engineers rotten life of sound imagery dot com executive producer is npr national public radio this is hearing voices or next time i'm katie every census chief justice of the united states john roberts roberts deliver the two thousand eight sixth memorial lecture on april thirtieth sponsored by the university of kansas school of business roberts was the chief justice to speak at the university's join us court chief justice john

roberts a midnight kansas public radio says it's b it's

b the play it's b it's been years

no it is it's

been it's b thank you no

man's b to prove the point the

piece it's b it's both the peak