Soul!; 91; Black Woman

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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . many times in the past. Penist composer Margaret Harris, currently the youngest musical director and conductor in Broadway, she will perform her original compositions. Emma Horaceford, an actress who has worked in films and on the stage, Anna appeared in Black Quartet and is presently a member of the soul staff. Common Neelavalard, mother of Leo Anthony Lamont-Holder, has been called the beauty symbol of today's total dancer. Nevela Nelson, actress singer, was appeared on soul as a singer many times. Tonight, Nevela is performing as an actress.

Poet Sonia Sanchez, mother of three. She is the author of two books of poetry, homecoming, and we are bad people. She's paying a return visit to soul. Sandra Shaw, actress, singer, poet. Her credits include Hello Dolly and to be young gifted in black. From the windows of my mind is a collection of Sandra's poems. Woman, the female human being distinguished from man, a sweetheart or paramour, mistress, a female person who cleans house, cooks, et cetera, et cetera. That's the best part. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Ha ha ha ha! Ha hiya! Ha!

Ha ha ha! It's a hot wolf to find out the love! So you're tryin' yours, ya brother. Might be a stepping stone, Everyone's just a link in this chain And once you're nine and we can stand the stranger What we need is from its barge For everyone to find the way to true salvation So why can't you see it's under your face It's not a chain of fame We're actionable To make the love of mankind The center of a truck Shine, shine We're actionable But you know it's rude to me To the good Lord's satisfaction If we bring it by the rules of this game We might be one of us Walked in for the game Though everyone seems to know it is true This is a chain of judgment come It's so long overdue

But just remember since the world's crazy When the Lord's given everyone A special invitation So why can't you see it's under your face It's not a chain of fame We're actionable To make the love of mankind The center of a truck Shine, shine We're actionable What you can only prove to me To the good Lord's satisfaction His love was torn up and didn't have time People, people that didn't remember So everybody can check in the star chain We're actionable Shine, shine Come on, come on and start a chain Shine, shine P parallel, shine Shine, shine

Come on, God, shine Come on, come on Shine, shine Don't say it's true It's so long My soul won't take My foreigners age Good God, everybody Thank you for the time. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The .

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.. .. . .. I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old

in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old in love, I'm going to need my ear-old more when I lay mine in love, I'm going to need my ear-old And then hold me on the floor

Just once more faith you can lead to Go in and go in and circle And now Go in and circle Yeah, yeah, yeah Go in and circle Oh, I'm stuck out All the new things All the new things Yeah, I'm a faceless clown Timeless hopes Never stop And when I feel this way

My soul, my soul Is that stay What am I to do? All the love All the money's there All the new things Please just give me a little hope Just once more faith you Lead to go Go in and circle Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah Don't you know I'm stuck out

All the new things All the new things I'm stuck out I'm stuck out of my view All the new things Yeah, yeah All the new things All the new things All the new things Oh, oh, oh, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We could hold out by the hell of luck. This is the end. If the whole world turns us back on me, I won't lose, I won't lose, cause I've got my

my baby, baby, and to me is my every thing. I ain't got to love nobody else, baby, I ain't got to love nobody else. I don't need no friends, I don't need no friends, no I don't. Cause when I'm down, his is only name I'm not a girl, yeah.

I ain't got to love nobody else, I ain't got to love nobody else, I ain't got to love nobody else. on the nation in this whole white world They wanted me Out of the technology I belong to my baby Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh. I'm not even even if you may.

You may, you may, you may. I got you. I got you. I got you right here in my house. I got you. I can't join. I'm such a lucky girl. I can't see you. I can't obey me. I can't obey me. I got you there. You there. to be a woman in the world as it was. I came to the earth given birth to our black lifestyle.

I came snapping my fingers, shaking my butt, changing my mind, poking my lips, sucking my teeth, taking my time. Rolling my eyes, dragging my feet, talking loud, running my mouth, being cute, walking proud. I came to the earth giving birth to our black lifestyle. To be a woman in the world as it is, I still snap my fingers, shaking my butt, changing my mind. Smile most times. I had straight ahead and feet picked up, talking mellow, talking smooth, being wise, lowered my evil, and I raised my pride.

So, come get your positive blackness and let it soak in your positive mind. Thank you. Once, when I was so high, I saw myself only from the waist down. A little skinny kid sitting in the grass. I could feel it so good. Grass, pricking my legs. And me and those stripes here, like the shorts I used to wear when I was five years old. Five years old, I was skinny. And legs like popsicle sticks, stretched out in the grass.

I was so high. I could even smell the green. And those shorts fit so loose on my legs. I could feel the breeze going up between them. I was just a little girl then and didn't wear no panties. Breeze could get to me real good. Breeze took me way back to Alabama for the night. I was a child then, but I ain't no child no more. I ain't got no business running around and seeing sucka shorts and enjoying the breeze and letting the grass prick my legs. Lord knows grown woman like me. I would have better things to do with my time. When she was little and colored and ugly with short straightened hair, though a very pretty smile,

she went to center school to hear about never chatted as the king of the Jews. And she would listen, she had read me, she had an event to go in the fire and she would learn how God was neither north nor south east nor west with no color, but all she remembered where she was black and coldly and she would think I want to be like that. Sister got up and let a strange man fumbling and impatient in the door. Mama stood there for a minute then she put the dish towel down and started hollering at the kids to go on to the show if they was going. Didn't nobody say nothing, but got the things and went into the hall. They turned back for her to say just who the stranger was and why she looked like that. But Mama, she just started hollering again, so they went on. I was in the back. I was always slow getting ready. And of course the other kids had gone, I was scared

to go out there alone. Mama said she was supposed to come at nine and it was eight. He grunted, did she want the ten or not? I stood there for a long time then he's the door shut and went downstairs the back way so she wouldn't know. People say they have a hard time understanding how I go on about my business, playing my Ray Charles, looking at the kids, seems like my afro cut off in some old image which I've got a long memory and I come from a long line of black and going on woman. Who got used to making it through murdered sons and who grief kept pushing who fried chicken, iron swept off the back steps who grief kept their still alive sons

for their sons coming for their sons gone. Just push it. 1,968 winters. I got up this morning feeling good and black. They can black thoughts and did black things. I played all my black records and I minded my own black business. Put all my best black clothes walked out my black door and Lord had mercy. White snow. CHEERING CHEERING CHEERING

CHEERING CHEERING CHEERING CHEERING Welcome home, my prince into my white season of no you, welcome home to my songs that touch your head and rain, green laughter and greeting welcome home to this Monday that has grown up with the sound of your name for I have chanted to yesterday's son to hurry back with his belly full of morning and you have come and I cannot look up at you my body trembles and I mumble things as you stand tall and sacred so easily I am so black self but I am here to love you to carry your name on my ankles like bells to dance in your arena

of love. You are tattooed on the round soft pods of me and your smell is always with me. Put that white girl back where you got her because I got the power to make you the eighth one come come get some of this magic VP positive VP strong VP womanly powerful soft black persuasion now if this sounds like a commercial it may be true but if I got to advertise then that's what I'll do come get some of this indigenous VP magnificent VP feminine black gold sweet sweet soft black persuasion

yeah how the day went while you were blooming within me I remember each up the swelling changed because of my body and how you first flooded then jumped and I thought it was my heart how the days wound down and the turning of winter I recall with you growing heavy against the wind I thought now my hands are formed and her hair started to curl now her teeth are done now she sneezes then the seed opened I bore you one morning just before spring

my head rang like a fiery piston my legs were towers between which a new world was passing from then I can only distinguish one thread within running hairs you flowing through cells toward you I had another one I had another one of those talks with my man last night I've been trying to tell him for a very long time that things aren't right but you know how you men are by the time you realize that something is wrong your woman has packed her bags and gone I told him very simply and very sweet baby you are losing me you have been losing me

for a very long time he wanted to know exactly what did I mean so I had to break it down to him seen by scene I told him you have been losing me every night that I sat by the telephone and waited and wondered and waited and finally cried myself to see you have been losing me when I wanted to dance but you didn't feel like it when I wanted to linger but you wanted to go when I came to you to talk and you turned away from me and a little bit more of me died inside you have been losing me baby when I wanted to make sandwiches and go play in the park in the sunshine and you wanted to watch the game on TV when after making love

I wanted to curl my small self into the warmth of your arms and talk about those things that lovers do talk about and you wanted only to smoke your cigarette and go to sleep you have been losing me day by day bit by bit heartbeat by heart string and now baby now I'm gone I always liked how it's cleaning, even as a child I dug straightening the cabinets, putting new paper on the shelves, washing the refrigerator inside out and unfortunately this habit has carried over to you and I'll find I must remove you from my life.

The first day I shot dope was on a Sunday. I had just come home from church got mad at my mother because she got mad at me you dig, went out, shot up behind a feeling against her, it felt good, good than doing it, yeah it was nice, I did it, I did it, I want to do it again, it felt so good and as the sister sits in her silent, remembered high, someone leans forward, gently asks her sister, did you finally learn how to hold your mother and the music of the day drifts into the room to mingle with the sisters,

young tears, and we all see. As a to your question of am I not your woman, even if you went on, junk again. And I, a beginner in your love, say no, I would not be your woman and see you disappear each day before my eyes, and know your reappearance to be a one night stand. No man, black lovers cannot live in white powder that removes them from they black cells, cannot write majestic white horses in a machine age,

black lovers must live, push against the devils of this world, against the creeping whiteness of their own minds. I am your woman, my man, and black women. They deal in babies and sweet, black kisses and nights that multiply by two. Thank you. Where have you gone with your confident walk, your crooked smile? Why did you leave me? When you took your laughter and departed, are you aware that with you when the sun, all light, and what few stars there were? Where have you gone with your confident walk,

your crooked smile with a rent money in one pocket and my heart in another? It's permissible to turn and fling your legs across the mattress. No one will be angry. I'm burning, burning still, sentimental woman who cannot readjust to lie in a single bed. Married once, and now I am forever waking up at night, calling, calling names. Tell me, baby, how do you adjust the flame? A fool who grins at her face in the mirror and tells herself it's pretty. A sentimental woman who pressed his shirts and washed his dirty underwear, who rubbed his back

with alcohol at night. I wonder why my insides don't match my outside anymore, mumbling to the mirror, turn off that light. I'm not one of those who believes that an active valor for a woman need take place inside her. My womb is packed with mothballs. And I hear that winter will be mild. Anyway, I gave birth twice, and my body deserves a medal for that, but I never got one. Mainly because they thought I was just answering the call of nature. But now that the revolution needs numbers, motherhood got a new position.

Five steps behind manhood. And I thought sitting at the back of the bus with Martin Luther King. I used to dream militant dreams of taking over America to show these white folks how it should be done. I used to dream radical dreams of blowing everyone away with my perceptive powers out of correct analysis. I even used to think I'd be the one to stop the riot and negotiate the peace. Then I awoke and dug that if I dream natural dreams of being a natural woman doing what a woman does when she's natural, I would have a revolution. APPLAUSE You reached into

Mara four centuries and draped them in robes of prophets. I'm called sister. And now you want to protect and write poems about me. But what I don't understand about my new beauty is, why is it not reflected in your eyes? APPLAUSE Take my shift so food. I do not wish to taste of pig of either gut or grunt from bow or jaw. I want caviar. Trim souffle. Sherry. Champagne. And not because these are the white still mains. But because I'm entitled for I've been V.D. enough. T.B.'d enough. Homecake fit. Not need enough. Spindly leg, bloodhound treat enough to eat

high on the hog. I've been hired last fight first enough. I've sugar-watered my thirst enough. Been lynched enough, slaved enough, cried enough, died enough. Been deprived, have survived enough. To eat high on the hog. Keep the black eye peas and begrids. The high blood pressure chops and gravy sops. I want a pair of teeth supreme. Bake the last, because something swab cooled. If I've been considered faithful food from 40 acres in on you, I've been slighted enough. Severed right enough and uptighted enough. And I want high on the hog. But dragging a cotton sack on bended knees armor to the great king cotton. For priming tobacco and earning pocket change. For washing and iron pots and warming by cold and For eating offers others tables. I've lived my wretched life between domestic rats and foreign wars. Caught it to my final rest and second hand cause.

But I've been leached enough dixie peach enough. Caught it leached enough at I want high on the hog. Oh, I've heard mouth screaming romanticizing pain. I hear they think they go against the grain. But I've lived long enough had strong beaten long enough. And I've been urban planned. On a enough at I want high Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I am the black woman mother of civilization Queen of black man produces his nation. If he does not woman, he will not

nation. It is my duty to teach and train the young who are the nation. teach my the history culture they are young. teach to and their so they adequate clothing shelter. care comfortable my husband and talk husband out the problems necessities running stable peaceful The I can strong, healthy intelligent to leaders tomorrow. always that the true worth of nation reflected through the and black woman of black woman a poor woman a poor woman

a boy woman carried of life healer warmth an foundation of the throne, velvet over thorns. Lookin' out on the morning rain. I used to feel so uninspired. And when I knew I had to face another day, Lord, it made me feel so tired. Before the day I met you, I'm for so untied. And you're the key to my peace of mind. But you'll make me free. You'll make me free. You'll make me free.

You'll make me feel like a natural woman. When my show was in the lost and found, you came along to claim it. I didn't know just what was wrong with me. To your kids, help me name it. Now I'm no longer doubtful. But what I'm leaving for, it ain't my name, can't be happy to do more. Cause you'll make me free. You'll make me free. You'll make me free. You'll make me feel like a natural woman. Oh, baby, what you've done to me,

what you've done to me. You'll make me feel so uninspired. You'll make me free. You'll make me free. You'll make me free. Cause to you you make me feel so mad. You'll make me free. You'll make me feel like a natural woman. You'll make me feel. You'll make me free. You'll make me feel like a natural woman. And you're a woman From a cubie game Soul is produced in the studios of WNET New York and supported by a grant from the Corporation for Public Broadcasting and the Ford Foundation.