Minds of men; The changing heart

The minds of men. Situation changing. Each of us has an undeveloped unrealized capacities for effective living. They await our true understanding of the mental and emotional forces at work within US forces which we share with the minds of men everywhere. It is toward a clear picture of what goes on in our minds and our emotions that we work in these programs. Not that picture as it appears on the broad canvas of all humankind. But as it is revealed in the small dimensions of everyday. In the lives of much like. Us. AS. Long as the. Love we are told is life's most cherished emotion. But what is love.

Where do we find it how do we use it where do we lose it. It is a word with four letter words. It is the universe and all within. Love is the force behind all creation. It's a noun and a transitive verb. It's the treasure of yesterday's memory the prize of tomorrow's QUEST. A child's comfort to a poet's go. A young man's need an old man's solace. Love lives in a lullaby in a look in the touch of two lives in the secret recesses of the enduring years. We flick it from our lips as casually as the ash from a cigarette. I love that high. We flunked it as crassly as a dollar sign. Love that soap. We counted to limitless for a finite way. There's just no way no way to tell you and pinion it in a popular song mood

or dream. And stalk it's wise in the mazes of model one diamond the one you love me carry me baby I don't know I just do. But why is it because I got pretty good shape. Q personality What is it Harry. Tell me I want to re-air is that one among us to whom love is a stranger and rarer still the one who knows all our love. For love was a changing face. And even in its truest aspects all with the seasons of the changing. Radio television the University of Texas presents the minds of men a

series of explorations into effective living. Reddened by the Durhams whens and directed by RC norks. These programs are produced under a special grant from the Educational Television and Radio Center in cooperation with the National Association of educational broadcasters. Their aim a keener understanding of the forces at work and the minds of men. It looks as if you're real busy as joints really jump in the headlines. Hopefully the paper they get the feeling edgy we sell I'm calm and comp but I seen. Well where does a fellow sit while he's imbibing this calm and comfort. That's a question I like. I'm not over there with a lady. She wouldn't live

the same as the some of them though some of them don't. She don't look the type. But you can't tell by looking. Maybe maybe she's expecting somebody. Maybe but he's a long time coming. She's been sitting right there all by yourself for the last three nights now. Anyways it's a seat as you say. Well send along a scotch and soda and I'll. Take a chance. OK. As soon as somebody clears. Do you mind. There wasn't any place else I suppose I shouldn't been. Well if you'd rather I didn't know. No it's quite all right. You weren't expecting someone I don't know. Scotch and soda. Right here. Could I. Won't you haven't for me. Thank you. That's all then for now thank you. That was a foolish answer to your question a lot ago not at all. The answer is of course. No. I wasn't really expecting anyone.

I say I was I guess you'd say I was hoping for someone will. Well I do. A special someone. Oh sorry. How could you know what I mean and I'm looking for a man. Come in here I'm here and you think you'll be back. I don't suppose I do really. But it's the only chance I'm as you know you're looking for. No that's the bad part. He thinks I know where you are you. Are you in love with this fellow very much. How about him is he in love with me. I don't know. I think so he was then. And don't you think as soon as he realizes you've lost him he will come running. I don't know if. It was some people tonight.

Lots of people have a kind of electric current generated by the headlights as the. Night. I think I was generating it myself. For the first time in my life. My first truly big time. And then coming into town with nothing. I should have. Hey watch were you're pouring I drink all right. Like just when I cut my hand you cannot have I really don't know. No indeed I don't give it a thought I'm sorry I thought you were some drugs. I could see my meds as a matter of fact it's the first drink I ever had lost on a

stranger. We can't let that happen. How about another. Oh no no I don't think so I cough again. Well then we'll see you pour it on somebody you know. I'm Brad Herrick I know my right. Hello Now how about that drink. Well I'm with the people we were just standing here waiting until we could get it where my kids were. They cut themselves a table like we give it over there but why would they leave me. Maybe they didn't want anybody to know they knew you throwing drinks around like that. I guess they did think I knew you probably figured you were an old friend. I'm trying to be between old friends here you take the bars too. Then if there's any it's going to be done I'll be the spiller and you can be the spill eat there now. Besides I did want to have one for about Houser's Bowzer McTeague as a boy back home. Awful day. Always an awful boy blank and mashed potatoes are the backbone of

church socials are. Exceptions. Why are we drinking our first drink to make cars. Well I don't quite and I had a letter from Bowzer today it makes me mad just. Think about it. So saying to him Oh you're so sure so sure of me you so sure I see the error of my ways come creeping home like a good girl from bouncer to take back if you wanted to. If you could convict seems Delphi was still a good girl. The noble Bowzer man to live up to that was if I wanted to make sure I did that when somebody said Let's drop in here for a night letter and I thought to myself just how not. Bowzer good idea. A true cause during specials down here might count me and my old friend we'll both fix about right. We did lots of other nights lots of other days.

I've never had such fun and never had any fun before. It wasn't so much what he did it was what he did. The things were there was life. Not many people have that. Nobody I know. Let's make an adventure with some little thing some silly thing like feeding popcorn counting the colors on the trees in the park. Seeing who could find the most startling irrelevant fact in the public life. You realize New York being upside down alters the boy at the end of your look attractive thing but I suppose it's just a matter of getting Oreo not me.

Never again I don't know you got to admit it induces a certain contemplative members like you on this crazy when you're just going over the bomb when you got your 50 cents will buy you a 6 1 win a combo for the little lady little lady one of when it got through. That's a very small family for a healthy couple. Not when we're single. Everybody needs a cuddle soft and squeezy one with two rings misthought only a quarter 25 cents to take the whole dollar friend and give me one ring one ring buddy but you're paying I know I know but one ring split is just exactly plenty for what I've got in mind. If you have a.

Mr. right. Right. Right right. Yeah. Yeah. Stuff is ready. Fred you want to say yeah yeah. Well what did I say. Bread stuff that faileth then. Oh I I'm sorry honey I didn't want to lose my place. What was it that supper's ready. Oh well look my rhyme. I'm going good on this thing why don't you go ahead. Don't wait for me. No I don't it's a special supper bread. I think I've got a surprise for you. Come on he won't take it. When you need a break you've been working on that report for two hours ever since you got home.

Yeah buddy. It's got to go in the mail by midnight and I don't see I'm going to make it as it is. Why don't you bring the supper in here about the surprise. I would just bring that along to that. That's a good girl and then we can eat and have our surprises and I'm going to be typing on this thing at the same time. All right all right I'll bring it in here if you talk to that I think you have got. My eye what's the matter. Well Iraq there. Was just. A wash out there. What's what are you doing what's all this about. What do you think. It's a ring in a bottle of a couple but I don't get the Masood don't you. Well through reading you hit the bottom I would cut about one one Mr.. Three is too small a family for a healthy couple remember so you want to know that this time it's a real this time Ira stop that stop it what are you going to do. When. My children let me start the way I wanted to I wanted to make it funny. It's not funny it's wonderful.

I don't want to screw with my parents but lots of people never just diapers bottles of pointless roll of bread for the gift. That's when I really began to lose him I think. I couldn't blame him of course who'd go on loving a woman that acted the way I did stead the awful things I say. The ironic thing was that after the baby daughter I really think she would have beautiful baby just like I'm done. But it was too late. He didn't believe I didn't love are in the wrong way.

Myra let her use your own legs. You can't carry around the rest of your life and the first thing I know she'll be digging in the dirt especially in the bird bath it's good for her that's fun it's you get always it it won't hurt if she does a warm day like this. So what. That's what birds afford to get dirty like water is to get wet with your right on your clothes take them off put some play go and designer internally so I know what I'd look nice some scrubby dirty little street urchin mama's good and beautiful that's what she and her mama want to clean fresh and pretty. Like a dog huge but she's not a doll. She's a little girl. Oh right. Does it hurt for me to leverage and want to look nice and fresh and sweet like a little girl. Yes it does it does hurt it if you love her like a doll instead of a person. A person needs to grow Mayra to develop and learn and reach out to new things. She's got to have room and freedom in the dirt in the water out of the ruffles and the starch beyond the fences and the arms she's got to

she's got to make her own adventures don't you see. Oh yes yes I see. Because I have to make my own adventures too. All by myself washing and cooking and cleaning and shopping not very gay or hardly not very sprightly but they've all I've got. It's been years since I fed popcorn to Aswan and years since I had anybody to do it with Mel. Well how about you bread. Do you make your own adventures too. And what are they now. Reading the paper. Going to work using the dictaphone talking politics with your barber. What's happened to his bread what's happened to the adventures we made. If this is what life is going to be like together I might I might just as well be Mrs Belzer McTeague. It would have been bad enough you see if you would just go on and read.

And then I'd fall in love. But it wouldn't be so. Not the way it worked when I realized he wasn't really gone not from everybody. That it was only I who had lost him because he didn't love me. But he was still there for somebody. But this is mad my right it's crazy you know. No it isn't. I heard your bread I heard you talking. Sure sure I talked to her she was a stranger she didn't know anybody is it a crime to talk to a stranger. I mean the way you talk to him was party talk froth right off the top of my head. It was special Talk special I'm going to be special I never saw the girl before in my life I can remember when you'd never see me before that's the way you talk to me first in the bar and it was first time talk I had to cheer you up for a little solemn thing you look so upset. So I guessed over pouring that drink down my back. Never forget the way you look.

I thought I'd bring your suit and I was horrified. I guess it was pretty corny. You must have been highly amused that I'd take it so big something that you know it wasn't so darn trivial. I look back on and it did go in my soup. Now that you look back on it don't you see Brad that's what I mean. That's what happened. Talking about I really need your suit. What have we got left. That's the way you remember the night we met. That's not the way I remember it. I remember rather vividly that a suit seems a small price to pay for for meeting somebody like you. Of course it did. But things changed Mayra values change. People grow up who are not a couple of irresponsible kids squandering what we have to look for what we want. Sampling life's flavors do we find the one we like best. We found it. We're a family now. We have children obligations responsibilities. The rule and suits are important. We're man and wife not us Spiller and believe that what you mean.

Yes yes I like it that way. I like the first time talking and making adventures together all the crazy things I like. It was part of us it was part of us. Then Myra. But that was a fantasy it was fun it was being in love. Fun is a child's word Maya. It's not part of love it's not a synonym and neither is adventure. I wouldn't say that it depends a lot on your sense of adventure and where you are in this business of loving people grow up in loving Myra the way they do when everything else hearts grow right along with minds and bodies and viewpoints. I can remember when the height of adventure was riding a bicycle with no hands. Later on it was meeting the girl I wanted to marry. Now it's being married to or that's adventure enough for me not frolicking around like a couple of Footloose kids but facing things together looking problems together building something good and enduring

together. We don't expect our children to go on playing with dolls and building with blocks. Oh no no of course not. Then why hang on to immaturity for ourselves Why settle for that in love. It's time we put away childish things. I don't want to put it away. I want to hold on to them for life. Bread. Food. Do you have a life. I did want to hold on to them all laughing things the fun things the childish things as Brad calls them they were important to me even if they weren't to him and I was going to have them. I was. With Brad if he'd let me. But if he wouldn't then with some thoughts a lock wouldn't tip and a few of their friends. What were you doing with that crew I just bumped into them at languages. They were having lunch and so was I so we had lunch together. Their men had utterly mad all of them.

Do you know what we did after lunch we went for a hairy ride isn't that the most idiotic thing. Just as we came out there was this man with a horse in a wagon and a load of hay. I haven't seen one in years nobody had. And there he was so to pay him twenty dollars to take us for a ride and he did. We've been riding for hours. I know I've been trying to find you. You have what for what for. What did you think was happening at home while you were riding on this load of hay or didn't you give that a thought. Well of course I did over was here until two o'clock. You told her you'd be home by two of the late was so I'm a little late. It's after five. Didn't harder to stay for one she didn't stay. She didn't stay. You mean she just walked out without a by your leave. She left a note on know what she had. Responsibility So did you Myra. I guess she figured if you could ignore it she could and Opal had a good excuse. What excuse what kind of excuse could you possibly have for a thing like this. A little better than yours I'd say. She has an invalid sister over in West. She has to be there to take care of the children when her husband goes to work. Well what about our children I'm glad you got

around to asking. They didn't fare so well. What do you mean by sissy got sick on the bus coming home from school sick. Well how sick sick enough so the bus driver didn't know what to do with her. He stopped off at a drugstore and called here and then when he didn't get an answer he called back to the school. They couldn't get me I was out of the office so they sent a teacher and the teacher took her to a doctor how he she is she's all right or she will be when we get her home. It was a stomach upset something she ate I guess but mainly she's all wrought up because when she needed somebody there was nobody on 10. Poor baby go get her bread. Well my Haven't you gone before now. Because I knew where she was. But I still had a wife to find and a son Bobby. Oh my goodness he had a scout meeting he didn't go. He went but he spent his last dime getting there. Why would somebody bring him home. They would have if he'd known you weren't coming. But he wouldn't leave with anybody even the scoutmaster because he was afraid when you came by for him he'd miss you when you'd be worried.

Right well I'd try to make me feel worse than I already do. I'm not trying to make you feel any way. Good heavens Myra don't you understand. I've been worried crazy about you your due home a tutu at the latest. Hours go by everything at home falls apart and as far as I can find out you disappeared from the face of the earth. I thought of calling the police the hospitals the the morgue even and then when I find you you you've been on a hay ride. I hate a ride where Don't say it like that it's no crime to go on a hay ride Oh it's great it's wonderful for kids. Well those other people weren't kids. I had a good time too. You forgot you. Forgotten how it feels to kick up your heels and let down your hair and be carefree and irresponsible. No I haven't forgotten my rock. I just traded that in on something I like a lot better a life and a home and some people it's a privilege to be responsible for. Sure it gets trying I know the deadlines the restrictions the having to stop and think about two or three other people and what they need

before you can think of what you want. I'll grant you it's a shade short on the whimsy and impulse. It's got to be. But I'll tell you something Myra. I've tried both and for my money I'd stake getting in our car and going after sissy and Bob knowing they're all right and I can bring him home safe and sound. I'd stake that particular ride against all the hay rides on earth. To get. That's the way I lost it just a little bit at a time. And one day he was gone. I don't know playing. I thought if I came back. That he'd find him again. Let me come back to. Yes but he has it you know and I know he's not

going to. Be a mind that so much very much. I don't think song. I don't think you really wanted to. What if he came through that door now you wouldn't want him involved. Run that man. Be honest with yourself. No that's not true. You've step three of him away from him beyond. He was necessary to you once his kind of love was necessary to you wants. It isn't enough. There's nothing to be gained by clutching back when you can reach out ahead. There's nothing in here there's more so much more. But if there isn't if I lose what I had to risk it. She did she who the girl who came in here that other night the one who was. How did you put it. Out on my own for the very first time in my life. Away from the familiar. Beyond the No. She didn't know what lay ahead either.

But it was intoxicating then not fearful. She was so young. But she'd already outgrown some things even then. People do you know all their lives grow out of some things grow into others do they grow out of being in love. I think so. And into love. That takes an older and wiser heart. You've outgrown them all Myra that girl and her heart and the man it was enough for them both. Let them go and this place too. It isn't exciting an electric or a threshold a place to look for somebody you love. No no I don't think it is. It's crowded and smoky and frenetic full of empty people who buy their comfort and their consolation. You don't need this place my right. Come back to it now and then if you want to look like an old school room to look for memories. But only for memories and not to stay

No. Never just say yeah. I see them now. Let's go home great. I want to go home. All right my darling. Any time you say. Changing heart one of a series of explorations into effective living titled the minds of men. A presentation of radio television at the University of Texas. These programs were prepared for broadcast under the supervision of Robert F.. Music by Eleanor. Going hard with her it is my role as the narrator and this program is distributed by the National Association of educational broadcasters.

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